537:- Plucky 14-year-old working-class school-girl solving crimes at her posh boarding school "the most exclusive academy in England for young English-Women" - located in the village of Slumber-on-the-Chintz. Weekly cliff-hangers which were improbably resolved, e.g., "with the help of this gun I happen to have". She has a former milkman's horse called "Milko" who has only 3-legs and so is referred to as "Crooked Milko" with which she attempts to win the gymkhana using his "superior dressage skills". Using a blend of class styles, she writes letters home with Cockney rhyming-slang expressions but addresses the letter to "Mater and Pater". Presumably her surname refers to
516:, or as inside jokes "Well, Master A. Hitler, I'd give up the painting, if I were you, the samples showed little promise, why not try some other hobby, say, public speaking .. few guns might be handy". All in a jolly, paternalistic, bombastic and often misogynistic style with sound effects suggesting additional off-mic activities (frequently shooting as he is evidently "gun" obsessed). His first name is revealed to be Fortinbras when he reads out a letter from a female reader accusing him of abandonment.
870:. A journalling explorer in Waoon Province with his "talented but inexpensive" guide Wattombi. He journals florid passages on the beauty of nature - which he then shoots and eats. On encountering a "white native" who insists his name is "Reggie" - he shoots him on the grounds the "plus fours and pith helmet weren't fooling anybody". He is boiled by pygmy cannibals setting of the expedition of Selsden Mace.
22:
158:
days of the 20th century, "a magazine for young and old across the
English-speaking world" featuring "Your old chum" the Editor (McGowan) presenting regular features, adventure stories, practical advice, readers letters, etc., complete with advertisements. An enthusiastic young reader (Baynham) could
800:
A Welsh preacher who provides little in the way of constructional detail beyond what can be discerned from the breaking up the title of the item. He relies on illustration "Plates" and "Figures" - which are rendered as sound-effects. He tends to end by waxing lyrical via an ode which the reader
387:- xenophobic stereotypes of "Johnny Foreigner" including such peoples as the Italians "Girls, a touch too keen to get his grubby hands on the contents of your bodice" or the Welsh "Bore-da to you, Evanses". Illustrated by photographs.
591:- sports instructress for Margate Young Women's Correctional Facility. Demonstrations by members of the Carshalton Breast Strokers. A jolly-hockey-sticks type who seems to harbor erotic thoughts about her under-age charges.
512:("Your Old Chum") - who presents both the "front-piece" - a read table of contents - and the Harpoon Club readers letters on the "rear-pages", with answers to (unstated) reader's questions, often for innuendo a la
272:- "..with 6 colour plates and numerous black-and-white illustrations..", "Price, sevenpence ha'penny net" (with higher prices for special editions), "..available throughout the Empire", "all rights reserved".
180:
were of high quality, as was technical production, using 'authentic' voices, sound effects, and music to evoke the era and create the impression of a magazine being read. The series has been released on
671:- "The tallest midget in Christendom". An Irish 6 foot 4 inch circus performer whose act consists of drinking lemonade on a bed, he yearns to be free of this intolerable circus life.
953:. A Scottish character with the catchphrase "Hello m'deerios" dispensing advice on mainly culinary matters while considering non-culinary items "no use whatsoever". Somewhat
585:- an equine presenter of the "cutout-and-keep" gift. The gift can turn out to be in several parts because it is a scale 1:1 "Oast House" that should not be assembled indoors.
828:
character). He has a 50% success ratio, for example in 1968 the motorways are "of solid oak construction". The cars are supersonic but have "silver-plated crank-handles".
1160:- Stonko Products - a sheet of plate glass that will shatter when dropped onto a hard surface. Stonko Products, Ltd, formerly Braithwaites Glass Works, Yorkshire.
619:- Toby's young chum who is "unusually well-built". Castrated by "underpaid grape crushers". Westcountry accent. Has been in the second form for seventeen years.
781:
The
Harpoon's contents were written by a wide-assortment of guest authors with satirical, posh-sounding names very much in the naming style of J.B. Morton in
565:- Scottish Headmistress of MeadowFields. Turns out to be the leader of the white-slavers. Revealed to be Sheik Mustafa Snape leader of the white-slave gang.
163:
attitudes towards such topics as education, class, sex, race, war, and the avuncular, paternalistic style adopted by interwar boys' publications like the
1016:
The Cruel Lagoon, She Pushed Too Hard, Gyspy Begone, The Fiery Totem, He
Courted a Slave, The Red Belgian, Saved by a Stilton, To Love a Costermonger.
1284:
637:
translated as "Orange
Tombstone Flannel", the princess of Lanada who marries Howard after he falls on and kills her mother and so makes her Queen.
506:
who delivers the magazine to The Reader, whistling as he does so, apparently tracking him down even when he is on vacation far away from his home.
1264:
1274:
1259:
926:
Locks himself in the house and starves to death even though he has a six-month supply of food strapped to the roof of his
Bentley outside.
541:. Her sleuthing is made easier by all villains she encounters having cloth caps, "distorted facial features", and all using binoculars.
1279:
159:
be heard turning (and once accidentally tearing) the pages and occasionally commenting. Much of the humour rested upon anachronistic,
143:. It consisted of three four-part series and two Christmas specials, and was performed by Julian Dutton, Peter Baynham, Susie Brann,
1084:
supposedly frank advice that "a young wife will have to perform for her husband on their honeymoon" - which involves machine-sewing.
173:
in the title was underscored by the illustrated front cover of the magazine, i.e. the opening music/sound effects of the programme.
113:
785:. In the first series, these were introduced with the titles of prior publications they had written for additional comedic effect.
625:- evil socialist warlord in Lanada. Seems unclear on how the "inter-regnum" after the ouster of the monarchy is actually being run.
251:
A harpoon being fired and apparently hitting some large beast which expires with a theatrical groan that was added in
Episode 2.
1269:
320:- written by the Rev. A. Morris, which has features like "How to build an uphill sledge" -> by attaching a rope to a sledge.
47:
1211:- a machine for flattening dead frogs to put them into an album. Simpson Sledgehammers Ltd.33 The Crescent, Blandford Forum.
631:- The three sidekicks of General Patata. Gazpacho rides a donkey called Paella and sings to it as it dies (again and again).
547:- Maisie Drummond's best friend, with an Anglo-Indian accent. She keeps getting kidnapped. Her mount is called Murray Mint.
94:
455:
with Nurse Dennis - "an alphabet of universal knowledge". Introduced by examples like "from angina to Zulus, removal of".
408:
Word Teazer - make more thematic words from a simple set like using "A Pot" and suggest words related to rabbit-keeping.
66:
43:
1187:- so invisible it appears not be effective. Chuck Morisson's Business Enterprises Ltd., Above the Chip-Shop, Worthing.
266:- A picture of a whaling ship "The Harpoon" with "oilskinned sailors greasing their harpoons and dreaming of blubber".
214:
1154:- "..well-appointed, genteel, affording splendid vistas of adjacent deer-park". J.Brown, 93 Burma Crescent, Toxteth.
559:- Maisie and the Mildred's "rotund chum" who is "fat, wears glasses and likes jam tarts, but is a good egg really".
73:
782:
32:
825:
381:- "fascinating facts at the foot of the page". These "facts" are either trivial observations or non-sequiturs.
80:
443:- "a loom" - spotting which would give the first reader to do so a "pocket-knife with bulls-eye attachment".
51:
36:
1142:
Cigarettes - "Promote health, vigor and happiness". "Guaranteed high-tar for clear lungs and fresh breath".
798:
How to Build a ..Wheelbarrow, ..Sledge, ..Chicken-Coop, ..WorkBench, ..Lectern, ..Goose-Restrictor, ..Wig.
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Goes to
Antarctica rather than Africa and is lost, setting off the expedition of Carsholton Edgar.
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553:- Maisie Drummond's school-chums, who all speak in chorus. They all ride ponies called Dobbin.
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A sequence journals of expeditions to find other explorers starting with Edmund Colt's ala
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A series of audio-rendered "Figures" illustrating stages in an improbable creatures life.
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1199:- they need a shopgirl or even two as they "intend to expand" - The Cornershop, Margate.
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428:
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898:- We Rode before Supper, Only a Giraffe, Too Soon for Oysters, Laughter in The Gallery
657:- "idiot maid" to Dr Schluppenshaft - who actually invented the comb but got no credit
1253:
1004:
Upper-class obsessive with a lisp. Journeys to Peru to find natives that worship sap.
954:
813:
She skated 'til she dropped, The Ballet Shoe Was
Missing, They Found the Ballet Shoe.
207:
151:, the series was nominated for a British Comedy Award for Best Radio Comedy in 1992.
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136:
1111:
Kiss of the
Cowhand - Prior Work - The Golden Toga, Pascoe Jack, I Shaved a Shepherd
411:
Spot the difference - two audio-illustrated "pictures" with very obvious differences
399:
Answers to last week's puzzles (improbable answers to questions which are not given)
1135:
Scattered throughout the magazine, usually asking the reader to write in response.
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924:
I Paid Her Well, Guttersnipe Jim, Luncheon or Death, I Packed My
Chiffon NeckTie.
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Suffers from a nasal obstruction, possibly brought on by a lack of "nose-cosy"
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963:- Nurse Dennis' dim assistant who reads out the titles in a halting manner.
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and Mary Elliott-Nelson. It was produced ("on stretched goat's vellum") by
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An archeologist who disturbed the tomb of Zargon The Great of Mesopotamia.
219:
500:- a schoolboy type prone to exclamations like "Yaroo! Now for some Fun!"
326:
ridiculous predictions of what is to come based on a 1920s perspective.
170:
1148:"Boys; become men". send to - J.Dixon, The SlaughterHouse, Wimbledon.
824:
An Old Etonian accent rather like James Fox or Mr Chumley-Warner (a
396:
Reader submitted "joke-ettes", prize a five shilling postal order
259:
As in a real magazine, certain features recur in many "issues" -
1205:"see your radio programs" - "available in black-and-white only".
1193:- "its very grey" - over 40 shades - 11 Chitterly Road, Wallasey
677:- "evil" ringmaster who proposes trips to the seaside for Dimmy.
609:- junior law-clerk from Mottram St. Andrew, lead character in
414:
Answers to Readers Letters - again with questions not provided
375:- Read out cels of comics usually with a weak pun as the basis
15:
938:
Crimes in Hoxton and Surrounding Villages - An Annual report
185:. Episodes from all three series are regularly repeated on
651:
would-be comb inventor - experiments include "varm milch"
197:
Among other pieces, some music found during the series:
736:- medic - winner of the "seal-pup hurling competition".
1166:- a device to remind "the busy housewife" to buy pork.
154:The programme was a spoof of boys' comics from the
135:series broadcast between 1991 and 1994, written by
689:- the knife admirer and rival for Eva's attentions
332:- illustrated lifecycles of fictional "creatures".
613:actually a Group-Captain in British Intelligence.
801:(wisely) turns the page away from in mid-stream.
1217:Bachelors Microscope Emporium, Cheam, PO Box 10
846:Wonders of Nature. Lifecycle of the Dutch Clog.
303:- an adventure serial "in the land of the Dago"
1178:"nasal pleasure at its finest" sponsor of the
169:in addressing their readers. The reference to
8:
1126:A WWI tale of badger heroism and derring-do.
760:- team household product salesman who did a
338:where the "cutout-and-keep" gift is located.
242:traditional, (Maisie Drummond's school song)
50:. Unsourced material may be challenged and
1068:- 938 "figures" culminating in being shot.
683:- trapeze artist and Dimmy's love interest
289:- starring Maisie Drummond - school song "
437:- with a ridiculously insignificant prize
114:Learn how and when to remove this message
1185:Morrison's Invisible Mending Sewing Pack
1180:Laughing Through the Depression Edition.
571:- member of the gang thwarted by Maisie.
427:- Great moments of British History in a
597:- of the Harpoon District Constabulary.
232:by Con Conrad and Cliff Friend sung by
1120:Collet - The Badger That Did Its Bit -
853:- Arctic Explorer, diverted to Africa.
524:Walrus-Clubbing for the Young at Heart
278:introduced by "Your Chum, The Editor".
7:
1027:principal ventriloquist in the show
920:- All for a Breast-Plate, Oh, Nepal,
478:Magic using a Goose as a Distraction
48:adding citations to reliable sources
1226:"Imperatus Foundatiamus Blubberum"
1066:The Life-cycle of the Bull Elephant
715:- friend of Professor Blizzard - a
344:- tales of exploration and Empire,
1124:Penguins Progress, I Knew a Goat -
522:- Master of the Harpoon. Author -
493:First Season Characters include -
14:
1203:Mickelwhite's Visual Radiograms -
701:The Case of The Haunted Moustache
695:- "The 2 foot colossus of Gwent".
311:The Case of The Haunted Moustache
730:Selsden Mace Expedition Members
20:
1285:Works about magazine publishing
951:Laughing Through the Depression
822:Door to Technology/The Future -
707:Professor Cornucopia Blizzard -
230:Yes, Yes, My Baby Said Yes, Yes
980:Leaf Collecting in The Lebanon
367:, The Badger That Did Its Bit.
1:
1146:Brewer's Military Mustaches -
1082:What Every Wife Should Know -
1074:- photographer, Milford Haven
934:In Search of Carshalton Edgar
483:Notable FirePlaces of England
1265:1994 radio programme endings
1031:Has an aspirated 'h' problem
629:Rioja, Gazpacho and Tortilla
545:Princess Tarin of Addabadaba
385:Boys/Families of Other Lands
215:Who's Been Polishing the Sun
176:Writing and performances on
1275:BBC Radio comedy programmes
1260:1991 radio programme debuts
916:In Search of Selsden Mace".
894:"In Search of Edmond Colt".
447:Whaling for the Under-Fives
1301:
868:Darjeeling with Black Dick
569:Abdul "the Arab" Caretaker
461:talk of physical exertions
425:Achievements of the Empire
1280:British Empire in fiction
1102:The History of the Tomato
1025:How to Throw Your Voice -
796:features - Prior Works -
575:Jenny Throgmorton Fanshaw
1057:The Birth of the Balcony
1012:The Brigands of Lanada -
902:Blood, Guts and Muffins.
754:- team French sous-chef.
663:The Life of Dimmy "Dolt"
649:Wilhelm Schluppenshaft -
635:Franela Lapida Naranja -
577:- a kidnapped schoolgirl
210:(used as opening theme).
1158:Broken Window Simulator
611:The Brigands of Lanada,
459:The Healthy Harpooner -
1270:BBC Radio 4 programmes
1191:Whitebounds Grey Paint
1172:"A brand-new interest"
1164:Pork Purchase Reminder
783:Beachcomber By The Way
379:Baffling but Bona-Fide
361:The life of Dimmy Dolt
301:The Brigands of Lanada
247:Signature Sound Effect
1176:Montmorency's Snuff -
1062:Miss Valerie Hastings
1048:The Story of the Comb
1039:The Story of the Comb
989:My Fight with a Finch
878:True-Life Tales. cf.
832:Miss Valerie Hastings
643:The Story of The Comb
449:- with Captain Bobbit
393:- read by The Editor
161:politically incorrect
985:Montgomery Withering
805:Della Vigilante Hill
589:Miss Winifred Gibson
349:Henry Morton Stanley
324:Door To The Future -
203:Soldiers of the King
44:improve this article
1152:Housing Development
1021:Henrietta Velveteen
1002:Rubber - The Truth.
768:Constantine Connive
725:- Blizzard's butler
669:Dimmy Dolt "Clinch"
420:Some were one-offs
391:The Harpooners Club
287:Meadowfields Maisie
236:(incidental music).
998:A Chat about Sap -
865:No More Exploring,
836:Wonders of Nature.
790:Reverend A. Morris
601:Brigands of Lanada
551:The Eight Mildreds
255:Recurring Features
1244:The Sunday Format
1092:The Joy of Wool -
994:Thornton Labrador
930:P.C. Gwen Matlock
876:- Illustrator of
851:Sir Mirian D'eath
713:Constant Bickwell
402:Picture crossword
330:Wonders of Nature
187:BBC Radio 4 Extra
183:Audible (service)
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1100:- Illustrator -
1078:Dr. Edith Pariah
1064:- Illustrator -
1037:- Illustrator -
1029:Tickle My Fancy.
908:Carshalton Edgar
863:. Prior Works -
811:- Prior Works -
752:Jean-Paul Maison
742:- team inventor.
740:Alistair Burkiss
675:Mr Timothy Smith
539:Bulldog Drummond
291:Gaudeamus Igitur
282:A Serial Feature
240:Gaudeamus Igitur
226:(closing theme).
145:Alistair McGowan
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912:True-Life Tales
890:True-Life Tales
861:True-Life Tales
818:Dr Mortimer Dim
809:Maisie Drummond
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748:- team dentist.
687:Figaro Ballcock
535:Maisie Drummond
514:Round The Horne
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307:Harpoon Mystery
297:Harpoon Romance
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429:LadyBird book
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1118:- Author -
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961:"Wee" Bobby
947:From A to Z
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859:- Author -
857:Edmund Colt
703:Characters
665:Characters
645:characters
603:Characters
583:Hobby Horse
531:Characters
473:Bird Scarer
178:The Harpoon
149:Sarah Smith
133:BBC Radio 4
128:The Harpoon
1254:Categories
1140:Cormorants
1090:- Author -
1053:Lazlo Feta
880:A.A. Milne
563:Miss Snape
510:The Editor
504:"Postie" -
498:The Reader
489:Characters
270:Title-Page
264:Front-Page
222:, sung by
74:newspapers
1237:Bigipedia
734:Raph Hick
717:Dr Watson
595:P.C. Poon
31:does not
1230:See also
1072:L. Minto
655:Griselda
220:Noel Gay
1131:Adverts
723:Withers
365:Collett
171:whaling
88:scholar
52:removed
37:sources
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617:Howard
557:Bertha
318:How To
156:Empire
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95:JSTOR
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