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Separating the filmography was probably a good decision, primarily because people often feel the need to create lengthy inline lists for no other reason than to throw in every name and title they can find for the sake of "completeness". Whether you want to create a separate list is up to you; I'm not
756:
The videos are approximately 20 minutes each, which doesn't seem to fit in with the style of an article. If you have the time and know-how, I'd even recommend creating a two or three minute montage of some of the most illustrative scenes from these videos. Such a montage would be appropriate for this
567:
Was Bare really that established by the time he joined the unit? I have no problem with his inclusion in the article and he was clearly qualified, but it seems as though he had done mostly short promotional films at the time. The same goes for
Sturges, as it doesn't appear he directed his first
602:"The film was very popular" How popular was it? With whom was it popular? Aviators, or their officers? Maybe even the general public? Was it the popularity that led to the production of more films, or was it the film's effectiveness in dealing with the flying errors?
163:
Many of the film entries are redlinks, and may never have articles due to lack of coverage. What do you think about adding a film summary in the Notes column? It may be too small--perhaps add a second dedicated row like you see with episode lists? Skip the
578:
Regarding the distraction comment, I was a little puzzled, so I looked at your source. It seems as though it was distracting for trainees in training videos. That might need some clarification, as my assumption was that it was distracting general
582:
The phrase "ever made it overseas" implies that being sent abroad (presumably for combat) is "making it", thus I would change it to "were ever sent outside the country" or "were sent into combat", whichever is more
709:
I have a pretty good feeling that this needs to be a subsection of "Life at Fort Roach" above. It relates directly to training, and doesn't fit in with the chronological narrative you had established up to that
586:"but it wasn’t the basic-basic" is a good quote (I smirked) but it's a little vague. Maybe you can find a way to keep the quote but clarify the statement to make it clear they were not conventionally trained.
752:
I'd probably just include a couple of videos: for
Winning Your Wings, which can be embedded next to that section, and for one of the animated videos, to include next to your paragraph of the subject of
611:
Strike "The production was of the highest quality and in recognition" so the sentence begins with "The feature-length..." I would add that it was nominated for best feature-length documentary in 1944.
288:
Note, for most if not all modern FACs, there's usually no requirement to provide any refs in the lead because anything there should be expanded upon (and referenced) in the main body of the article.
475:
I would remove the comma after World War II and strike the phrase "was unique in that it was". I don't think you have to explicitly say it was unique, especially if it was the first of its kind.
564:
in 1950. The statement is also
American-centric, as there were quite a few well-known actors elsewhere (American cinema was not nearly as dominant of the marketplace then as it is today.)
153:
I've listed this article for peer review because I am going to eventualy nominate it for FA or FL. I'd like any general advice you have to offer, and specific advice on the following:
455:
I like the notes in the right column, but only to describe the purpose of the film or important details related to the unit, so what you're doing already is fine. Avoid plot details.
484:
Were the films released theatrically in the United States, or internationally? If released elsewhere, any idea on whether the international response was as positive as the domestic?
493:
Isn't serving with "distinction" a specific military designation? I'm not very sure, and I think it would be a good idea to wikilink it to the appropriate definition if one exists.
571:"Cavalry Reserve" and "Captain" in the Reagan sentence don't need to be capitalized, unless referring to "Captain Ronald Reagan", nor does "Personnel Officer" or "Adjutant". See
410:
I think this should eventually be two articles - one on the unit itself (potential FA) and one as a filmography (potential FL). If you want an example of a fairly listy FA, see
560:
I'm very iffy on the "wellknown film professionals of the day" claim. Clark Gable was definitely at the top of the charts, but
William Holden didn't hit the big time until
189:
I don't think the filmography should be split off, you'd end up repeating a lot of the main prose in a standalone list, I think it makes a good comprehensive article as is.
126:
766:
You already know this, but you'll need more sources eventually. I've thrown in a few here and linked to their respective pages on Google Books that discuss the FMPU:
122:
490:
Instead of "The unit not only produced training films, but trained combat cameramen." maybe "The unit also produced training films and trained combat cameramen."
107:
837:
With the exception of a few missing commas, the vast majority of the prose is clear and easy to read. This is a fun read, so keep working at it to refine it.
76:
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644:
Since the unit did not actually bomb Japan themselves, I don't know if the heading title is appropriate. Perhaps "Reconnaissance for bombing of Japan"?
481:
You could add some kind of description for "400 films", such as "400 narrative, training, and informational short features and feature-length films".
411:
823:
These reviews can feel like a bear sometimes, like your hard work isn't appreciated, so I wanted to point out some of the good stuff as well:
830:
With the exception of the "Combat cameraman training" section mentioned above, this has a very clear, linear structure that's easy to follow.
664:
with "eighty foot by sixty foot scale model (1 foot = 1 mile)" might make it easier to manage. "80-by-60-foot (24 m × 18 m) (1 foot:1 mile)"
589:
I could be wrong, because I'm not familiar with military usage, but "barracks" would normally be plural, and would not have "a" before it.
827:
There's a lot of really interesting information here, and you do a fine job of illustrating the importance of the unit's accomplishments.
414:, but I see this as more like an article on a famous director or actor/actress, and then a filmography (list) of that person's films.
186:
Wouldn't look entirely out of place at FLC but there's a heap of prose so it could be FAC too. So that's not very helpful is it?!
171:
Finally I know the sources need work--date, publisher, etc.--so you can dispense with formatting comments on sources. Thanks, –
863:
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Not keen at all on a category in the see also links. At least pipelink it so it doesn't display across a cross-wikispace link.
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First of all, this is a pretty interesting subject, so thanks for spending time on it. Some thoughts and suggestions:
44:
478:
As someone who has a keen interest in film, "created" isn't quite as specific as "produced". I would use the latter.
746:
Since this section is a filmography of sorts, I'd recommend changing its name to "Filmography" to be more specific.
657:"The United States in 1944 was readying its forces..." should be "In 1944, the United States readied its forces..."
398:
62:
198:
6 dab links, Distinguished Flying Cross, Craig
Stevens, Frank Thomas, Robert Morgan, Paramount and Arthur Kennedy.
272:
According to this source. Moreover, I don't recall any of the sources mentioning that women served in the unit.–
92:
50:
487:
I'd strike "famous" before "actors". They're definitely famous, but there's no reason to reiterate that fact.
195:
Video thumb sizes are fine for me, they're not forced beyond the normal thumb size and I think that's best.
262:
It's not written in any MOS that I've ever found, but I would expect to see references in numerical order.
719:"Alumni of the program were "highly praised and much decorated."" needs to have a source for the quotes.
394:
17:
624:"pitfalls to avoid" can be just "pitfalls". There's no such thing as a pitfall you don't want to avoid.
732:, field marshal of Germany's armed forces, noted the decisive role played by film production units: "
529:
was directed by Owen Crump, and featured James
Stewart as a dashing pilot." to "Owen Crump directed
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654:
Technically, the information would not be "used by B-29 Superfortresses" but rather by their crews.
572:
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419:
749:
I have no problem with video in articles, but the amount of videos here seems stacked and crowded.
285:"and The Last Bomb–all of which " not keen on the style of that unspaced en-dash in this sentence.
695:
I'd remove "infamous". The fact that they're concentration camps makes them infamous by default.
496:
The final sentence feels a little out of place. Is the documentary where the unit got its name?
525:
To change the passive sentence to active and eliminate some personal description, I'd change "
661:
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449:
As written, this is definitely an article more than it is a list. I'd keep it that way.
415:
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232:, you probably don't mean a footballer born 11 years after he appeared in this film.
728:
The syntax in the sentence about Keitel is a bit awkward. Maybe try "Field
Marshal
592:
I'll admit I didn't know what "billited" meant. You might want to wikilink that to
382:
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605:"considered to be the "best educational film" produced during the war." By whom?
229:
802:
The Japan/America Film Wars: World War II Propaganda and Its
Cultural Contexts
618:
374:
Avoid double hyphens in the prose, stick with spaced en-dashes for instance.
341:
Participants, if you wish the col to be sortable, ought to sort by surname.
452:
Answered below, but the bottom line is that it's basically your choice.
716:"was due to Fort Roach alumni." to "was filmed by Fort Roach alumni."
593:
685:
I'd change the title to something like "European bomb damage survey"
546:
Be sure to remain consistent with putting "the" in front of "FMPU".
513:"Army" needs to be "United States Army" or the more general "army".
783:
Duty, Honor, Applause: America's
Entertainers in World War II
713:"from 20 to 30 men" Perhaps "Between 20 and 30 enlisted men"?
630:"The Animation department" doesn't need to be capitalized.
228:
Check the actors link to the pages you'd expect, e.g. by
298:
I added every film I could reliably attribute to FMPU.–
141:
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Should the filmography be split out into its own list?
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I'd remove (1) and (2) from dual purpose of the unit.
291:
How did you select the "selected" Warner Bros. films?
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should be wikilinked the first time, not the second.
688:The first sentence could probably read "After the
70:
8:
458:The size of the video thumbnails seems fine.
157:Would this make a better FA or FL candidate?
150:This peer review discussion has been closed.
725:"It was at this time that he" to "He then"
533:, which starred James Stewart as a pilot."
77:
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311:No need for notes column to be sortable.
192:Summaries are good if you can add them.
167:Should I make the video thumbs smaller?
35:
412:Waterfalls in Ricketts Glen State Park
7:
599:"feature length" to "feature-length"
774:Confessions of a Hollywood Director
811:Governor Reagan: His Rise To Power
692:, General Arnold ordered Crump..."
24:
510:"December 1941" is fine, no "of".
834:very familiar with that process.
722:Strike "sprang into action and".
352:
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240:
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516:No comma needed in "March 1942"
667:Names of newspapers, like the
617:Perhaps wikilink "gunners" to
1:
690:end of World War II in Europe
393:Hopefully a start for you.
381:Think I gotr all of them. –
791:The November 1943 issue of
568:mainstream film until 1946.
880:
850:16:28, 18 July 2012 (UTC)
702:Combat cameraman training
176:23:04, 22 June 2012 (UTC)
28:First Motion Picture Unit
444:Answering your questions
430:12:15, 1 July 2012 (UTC)
403:11:00, 1 July 2012 (UTC)
386:03:33, 5 July 2012 (UTC)
366:03:33, 5 July 2012 (UTC)
333:03:33, 5 July 2012 (UTC)
303:03:33, 5 July 2012 (UTC)
277:03:38, 5 July 2012 (UTC)
254:03:33, 5 July 2012 (UTC)
220:03:06, 5 July 2012 (UTC)
864:July 2012 peer reviews
678:Bomb damage in Europe
614:Strike "utilization".
18:Knowledge:Peer review
265:"1,110 men" all men?
819:Some positive stuff
793:Popular Photography
541:Burbank, California
553:Life at Fort Ranch
539:"Burbank, CA" to "
531:Winning Your Wings
527:Winning Your Wings
520:Winning Your Wings
671:, are italicized.
608:Strike "In fact".
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142:Watch peer review
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662:Template:convert
637:Bombing of Japan
627:Strike "to use".
562:Sunset Boulevard
436:Further Comments
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573:WP:JOBTITLES
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117:Article talk
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762:Source help
649:Gregory Orr
621:to clarify?
230:Vince Evans
104:visual edit
753:animation.
660:Using the
619:Air gunner
579:audiences.
503:Background
842:Runfellow
583:accurate.
422:<: -->
416:Ruhrfisch
858:Category
757:section.
463:Sections
181:Comments
164:summary?
772:Bare's
127:history
108:history
94:Article
36:Toolbox
710:point.
594:Billet
383:Lionel
363:Lionel
330:Lionel
300:Lionel
274:Lionel
251:Lionel
217:Lionel
173:Lionel
739:Films
421:: -->
136:Watch
16:<
846:talk
468:Lede
399:talk
358:Done
325:Done
246:Done
212:Done
123:edit
100:edit
860::
848:)
401:)
361:–
328:–
249:–
215:–
140:•
125:|
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844:(
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596:.
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543:"
425:°
397:(
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121:(
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98:(
78:e
71:t
64:v
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