Knowledge (XXG)

Crad Kilodney

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1125: 1111: 337:, about the joke perpetrated by an English teacher after the death of one of the students he loved, is an absolute treat. It is infused with bright language and a side-splitting hilarity, as well as an underlying quiet bitterness and tragedy ... When Kilodney allows himself, he has sympathy and understanding for people and what makes them work, or not work. In much the same way, 261:, and of course the vanity press. He was, however, not interested in being seen as a crank or an eccentric, but simply wanted to find respectable, legitimate work as a writer and be taken seriously for doing so. Nevertheless, he also enjoyed pranks, and in 1988, Kilodney submitted a number of stories by famous writers to the 387:
Vol. 3 (a 90-minute cassette) is from 1991. "Dub 154" of this tape, a representative example, includes photocopied typewritten notes detailing the recording process, transfer technique and equipment used. Kilodney handwrote with ballpoint pen on the cassette jacket as well. Side A has 11 recordings,
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material was written by him ("and a group of selected colleagues") in a range of deliberately awful styles, under a variety of pseudonyms. He insisted, however, that the bad poetry he anthologized had been collected from a number of sources, and it was all correctly attributed (including works by
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and U.S. culture generally, Trifon moved to Toronto in 1973 where he worked at a number of other book publishers, mostly in their stockrooms. While doing so, he continued to make very occasional sales of short stories and humor pieces to small magazines, but decided that it might be best to reach
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After receiving an inheritance, Kilodney retired from selling his self-published books in 1995. To continue making income, he took up trading mining stocks, which allowed him to live modestly for the rest of his life. Nevertheless, he continued writing, and looked for new ways to distribute his
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At various times Kilodney kept a tape recorder with him and recorded quite a bit of bizarre byplay between himself and prospective customers. He then compiled the oddest or most entertaining exchanges into hand-made cassette tapes ("On The Street With Crad Kilodney" Vols 1, 2, 3, and 4) which he
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all about? Well, it's hard to say ... There's no high point to it, except perhaps in great one-liners ... but then again, it's not meant to develop into anything more than what it Is. And what is that? Just stories of funny bits taking shots at the institutional world. And these are worth reading
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In 1991, Kilodney was charged with selling commercial goods without a licence, making him the only Canadian writer ever charged for selling his own writing. In response, Toronto hardcore band (and long time supporters of the Independent DIY ethos) Armed & Hammered released the song "Crad
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Kilodney died of cancer on April 14, 2014, at the age of 66. He never married, and left no heirs. The day after his death and at his request, his friend, artist Lorette C. Luzajic, launched the Crad Kilodney Literary Foundation, a website dedicated to preserving and promoting his works. A
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Side B 16 recordings; four of the recordings are answering machine messages, and the rest are the famous surreptitious encounters with people wondering why this man has a sign around his neck. "Excrement" and "Putrid Scum", as well as several of his stories (such as "Henry", featured in
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people by self-publishing his stories (under his own Charnel House imprint) and selling them face-to-face on the street. This he did from 1978 through 1995, publishing 32 books in this manner, using the name Crad Kilodney. Kilodney could generally be found, and indeed was a fixture, on
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From April 2008 until a few months before his death, new satirical articles (and the occasional short story) were posted on Kilodney's blog. A series of 20 articles on "Exotic Cities" that had been published in 2009 were translated into French and collected in the volume
290:"offbeat, puzzling and, quite frankly, outrageous ... Kilodney's absurdist style and quirky humor will limit his appeal largely to adventurous readers. But those readers will find some entertaining stories in the new collection." 446:
Most of these collections contain 3 to 8 stories, and are between 34 and 80 pages in length. Most were self published, and appeared as stapled, photocopied pamphlets, in print runs of 800–1,200 copies. There are exceptions:
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Kilodney posted his final blog entry, a short story called "Dreaming With Jay", in December 2013. He thanked his readers for their support, and noted that "This is the last piece I will publish in my lifetime."
765: 120:, in 1948 to a Greek family. In the autobiographical book "Excrement", he says that February 13 is his birthday. He graduated from Syosset High School in 1965, then obtained a degree in 210:(1991) was Kilodney's only full novel. Though the vast majority of the work offered for sale was Kilodney's own, he also edited and sold several anthologies under the banner of 1218: 1213: 143:
in general, shaped his outlook on fiction and provided him with material for many stories. The stories "Three Dead Men" and "A Moment of Silence for Man Ray" (both in
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building with a cardboard sign hanging from his neck, holding a book he was selling. His attention-getting signage, always handwritten, might give a book title (e.g.,
360:"a collection of short stories by Canada's funniest fiction writer. The title story is the funniest story I've read in years. Kilodney is an undiscovered genius..." 1228: 1223: 872: 1238: 1233: 1198: 235:, and at least one poem attributed to Kilodney himself.) Though he sold most of his work on the streets of Toronto, in the acknowledgments section of 1208: 1203: 160:
between 1970 and 1972. According to information on his unofficial website, Kilodney wrote the first unsolicited short story ever accepted by
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Kilodney commented that while most writers are inspired by conventionally great literature, he drew inspiration from the exact opposite: the
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The books themselves were usually pamphlet-sized collections of short stories, ranging from 32 to 80 pages in length. More rarely, as with
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succeeds because the author forgets himself and enters the spirit of another person trapped in a different kind of world. On the whole,
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offered for sale alongside his books. They are extremely rare and are collector's items (much as original printings of his books are).
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anthology, and in 1998 his previously published story "Girl On The Subway" was included in the mainstream literary anthology
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material. In 1996, Kilodney's satirical piece "Circumcision Rites of the Toronto Stock Exchange" appeared in the 1996
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More in line with Kilodney's literary ambitions, also in 1988 Black Moss Press issued a 'best-of' collection called
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Black Moss Press issued two anthologies, each around 100 pages, of Kilodney's 'selected stories'. Aside from
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Kilodney is at his best when his sense of humor steps in, ironic, mocking and laced with sadness ...
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literary competition, many under absurd names. All of the stories were screened out by the jury.
240: 228: 258: 95:. He was best known for selling his self-published books (often with outrageous titles such as 797: 460: 247: 232: 140: 117: 39: 1073: 766:"Obituary: A connoisseur of the bizarre, Crad Kilodney railed against hypocrisy of the world" 276:) appeared in 1990. These were generally the only Kilodney volumes available in bookstores. 239:
Kilodney thanks his sister Carol, noting that "she sells many of my books in her pizzeria in
321: 129: 873:"Late street poet and publishing scourge Crad Kilodney left behind a surprising legacy" 402: 310:
one of the funniest books of the year, and it ought to be a bestseller ... But what is
282: 1177: 224: 195:), or a mocking self-description of his wares (e.g., "Slimy Degenerate Literature"). 154:
in 1969, and taking on the name "Crad Kilodney", published very occasional pieces in
733:(1977) (18-page booklet, as Louis Trifon, with Mick Rawsterne and George Cairncross) 670:, these were the only Kilodney volumes generally available for sale in bookstores. 452: 363:
Kilodney also wrote for a variety of publications, Canadian and otherwise, such as
352: 299: 180: 151: 132: 1160:- Dedicated to the preservation and promotion of the literature of Crad Kilodney. 254: 97:
Bloodsucking Monkeys from North Tonawanda, Suburban Chicken-strangling Stories
1168: 848:"Author Crad Kilodney was a cranky and courageous fixture on Toronto streets" 791: 796:. Fisher - University of Toronto. Toronto : Charnel House. p. 80. 175: 128:. Instead of continuing in that field, he took a job at Exposition Press, a 121: 88: 421:(2012). This was the last of Kilodney's books published in his lifetime. 84: 92: 53: 1163: 1157: 451:
is over 100 pages, contains 18 stories, and was published by
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called the book's stories "sadly uneven," she went on to say
218:. Kilodney later admitted that most—although not all—of the 550:
The Scarlet Book: The Flame-Broiled Humour of Crad Kilodney
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Other mainstream critics also praised Kilodney's fiction.
103:) on the streets of the city between about 1978 and 1995. 914:"CBC Radio hoping its short-story contest still credible" 544:
The Yellow Book: The Outlandish Humour of Crad Kilodney
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The Green Book: The Polymorphus Humour of Crad Kilodney
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Kilodney was in a relationship with poet and novelist
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The Blue Book: The Eccentric Humour of Crad Kilodney
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Kilodney Was Innocent" on a 7" single vinyl record.
371:(for which he wrote a monthly column at one point). 1131: 1118: 1100: 70: 60: 46: 28: 21: 888:"Faulkner, Kafka stories rejected in CBC contest" 526:The Orange Book: The Bent Humour of Crad Kilodney 1022:"Anti-establishment scribe's prose sadly uneven" 718:The Second Charnel House Anthology of Bad Poetry 407:Concrete Forest: The New Fiction of Urban Canada 139:. Many of his experiences in that job, and with 116:Louis Trifon (as he was then known) was born in 712:The First Charnel House Anthology of Bad Poetry 429:posthumous collection of his online writings, 396:Retirement from self-publishing and later work 150:He sold a few humor-oriented articles to the 8: 1074:"Uncategorized – Crad Kilodney–New Writings" 600:(assorted on-line writing, 1988–2013) (2015) 467:, issued posthumously, is almost 400 pages. 759: 757: 755: 753: 751: 749: 747: 662:Anthologies of previously collected stories 1123: 1109: 1097: 1088: 941:"A Literary Illusion For April's Fool Day" 688:(11 stories, dating between 1979 and 1988) 679:(13 stories, dating between 1978 and 1985) 580:Blood Sucking Monkeys from North Tonawanda 392:) are also inspired by these experiences. 18: 1219:21st-century Canadian short story writers 1214:20th-century Canadian short story writers 821:"Cult literary figure Crad Kilodney dies" 815: 813: 358:Bloodsucking Monkeys From North Tonawanda 216:The Charnel House Anthology of Bad Poetry 556:Incurable Trucks & Speeding Diseases 1091: 790:Kilodney, Crad; Kilodney, Crad (1988). 743: 339:The Simplified Existence of Mr. Duggins 286:, Glen Colbourn called the stories in 7: 684:Girl on the Subway and other stories 520:Bang Heads Here, Suffering Bastards! 367:, 'What' (a literary magazine), and 274:Girl On The Subway and other stories 187:downtown campus and in front of the 592:Suburban Chicken Strangling Stories 170:Move to Canada, and self-publishing 1229:21st-century Canadian male writers 1224:20th-century Canadian male writers 966:Colbourn, Glen (August 22, 1988). 315:just for the sheer joy of reading. 14: 1239:21st-century pseudonymous writers 1234:20th-century pseudonymous writers 1199:Canadian male short story writers 1158:Card Kilodney Literary Foundation 993:Gervais, Marty (March 31, 1984). 939:Kilodney, Crad (March 30, 1989). 886:Bastien, Mark (January 6, 1989). 345:contains a few remarkable gems... 968:"Author succeeds at being worst" 87:of Lou Trifon, an American-born 83:(1948 – April 14, 2014) was the 1105:Thomas Fisher Rare Book Library 1054:. October 15, 1989. p. 11F 920:. January 12, 1989. p. C10 846:Fiorito, Joe (April 30, 2014). 508:Sex Slaves Of The Astro-Mutants 995:"Mindless, yes, but hilarious" 764:Levin, Martin (May 10, 2014). 706:Worst Canadian Stories, Vol. 2 700:Worst Canadian Stories, Vol. 1 586:Junior Brain Tumours in Action 574:I Chewed Mrs. Ewing's Raw Guts 237:Worst Canadian Stories, Vol. 1 1: 1209:University of Michigan alumni 1204:Writers from Queens, New York 1020:Lau, Evelyn (July 21, 1990). 1149:How to use archival material 657:(2012, French language only) 1194:People from Jamaica, Queens 1062:– via Newspapers.com. 1036:– via Newspapers.com. 1009:– via Newspapers.com. 982:– via Newspapers.com. 955:– via Newspapers.com. 928:– via Newspapers.com. 902:– via Newspapers.com. 484:Gainfully Employed in Limbo 335:The Funeral of Lenny Zeller 319:Although Evelyn Lau, in an 272:. A follow-up collection ( 1255: 1164:Crad Kilodney–New Writings 1052:South Florida Sun-Sentinel 655:Villes Bigrement Exotiques 568:Nice Stories for Canadians 419:Villes Bigrement Exotiques 562:Simple Stories For Idiots 356:, Richard Grayson called 250:before she died in 1987. 193:Simple Stories For Idiots 502:Human Secrets - Book Two 496:Human Secrets - Book One 490:Lightning Struck My Dick 449:Lightning Struck My Dick 411:McClelland & Stewart 147:) are examples of this. 1169:Crad Kilodney -Archives 623:Foul Pus From Dead Dogs 478:World Under Anaesthesia 442:Short story collections 303:, Marty Gervais called 1048:"What They're Reading" 347: 317: 220:Worst Canadian Stories 212:Worst Canadian Stories 189:Toronto Stock Exchange 126:University of Michigan 65:University of Michigan 331: 308: 185:University of Toronto 1137:Crad Kilodney papers 433:, appeared in 2015. 157:The National Lampoon 137:Hicksville, New York 91:writer who lived in 1122:MS COLL 00278  725:Collaborative work 390:Girl on the Subway 351:The South Florida 343:Girl on the Subway 327:Girl on the Subway 241:Westbury, New York 229:William McGonagall 145:Girl on the Subway 1154: 1153: 1143: 1142: 892:The Vancouver Sun 803:978-0-920973-10-3 689: 680: 461:Coach House Press 459:was published by 288:Malignant Humours 270:Malignant Humours 248:Gwendolyn MacEwen 233:Karen Mac Cormack 141:vanity publishing 118:Jamaica, New York 78: 77: 40:Jamaica, New York 1246: 1139: 1127: 1114: 1113: 1098: 1089: 1078: 1077: 1070: 1064: 1063: 1061: 1059: 1044: 1038: 1037: 1035: 1033: 1026:Edmonton Journal 1017: 1011: 1010: 1008: 1006: 999:The Windsor Star 990: 984: 983: 981: 979: 963: 957: 956: 954: 952: 945:New York Newsday 936: 930: 929: 927: 925: 918:The Windsor Star 910: 904: 903: 901: 899: 883: 877: 876: 869: 863: 862: 860: 858: 843: 837: 836: 834: 832: 827:. April 15, 2014 817: 808: 807: 787: 781: 780: 778: 776: 761: 687: 678: 675:Malignant Humors 379:Audio recordings 365:Only Paper Today 322:Edmonton Journal 163:National Lampoon 93:Toronto, Ontario 54:Toronto, Ontario 19: 1254: 1253: 1249: 1248: 1247: 1245: 1244: 1243: 1174: 1173: 1135: 1108: 1087: 1082: 1081: 1072: 1071: 1067: 1057: 1055: 1046: 1045: 1041: 1031: 1029: 1019: 1018: 1014: 1004: 1002: 992: 991: 987: 977: 975: 965: 964: 960: 950: 948: 938: 937: 933: 923: 921: 912: 911: 907: 897: 895: 885: 884: 880: 871: 870: 866: 856: 854: 845: 844: 840: 830: 828: 819: 818: 811: 804: 789: 788: 784: 774: 772: 763: 762: 745: 740: 731:Prose Political 727: 696: 664: 651: 638: 607: 444: 439: 409:, published by 398: 381: 172: 130:self-publishing 114: 109: 61:Alma mater 56: 51: 42: 37: 35: 34: 24: 17: 16:Canadian writer 12: 11: 5: 1252: 1250: 1242: 1241: 1236: 1231: 1226: 1221: 1216: 1211: 1206: 1201: 1196: 1191: 1186: 1176: 1175: 1172: 1171: 1166: 1161: 1152: 1151: 1145: 1144: 1141: 1140: 1133: 1129: 1128: 1120: 1116: 1115: 1102: 1094: 1093: 1086: 1085:External links 1083: 1080: 1079: 1065: 1039: 1012: 985: 972:Calgary Herald 958: 931: 905: 878: 864: 838: 809: 802: 782: 770:Globe and Mail 742: 741: 739: 736: 735: 734: 726: 723: 722: 721: 715: 709: 703: 695: 692: 691: 690: 681: 663: 660: 659: 658: 650: 647: 646: 645: 637: 634: 633: 632: 626: 620: 614: 606: 603: 602: 601: 595: 589: 583: 577: 571: 565: 559: 553: 547: 541: 535: 529: 523: 517: 511: 505: 499: 493: 487: 481: 475: 443: 440: 438: 435: 403:Pushcart Prize 397: 394: 380: 377: 283:Calgary Herald 171: 168: 113: 110: 108: 105: 76: 75: 72: 68: 67: 62: 58: 57: 52: 50:April 14, 2014 48: 44: 43: 38: 32: 30: 26: 25: 22: 15: 13: 10: 9: 6: 4: 3: 2: 1251: 1240: 1237: 1235: 1232: 1230: 1227: 1225: 1222: 1220: 1217: 1215: 1212: 1210: 1207: 1205: 1202: 1200: 1197: 1195: 1192: 1190: 1187: 1185: 1182: 1181: 1179: 1170: 1167: 1165: 1162: 1159: 1156: 1155: 1150: 1147: 1146: 1138: 1134: 1130: 1126: 1121: 1117: 1112: 1106: 1103: 1099: 1096: 1095: 1090: 1084: 1075: 1069: 1066: 1053: 1049: 1043: 1040: 1027: 1023: 1016: 1013: 1001:. p. C11 1000: 996: 989: 986: 974:. p. A13 973: 969: 962: 959: 946: 942: 935: 932: 919: 915: 909: 906: 893: 889: 882: 879: 874: 868: 865: 853: 849: 842: 839: 826: 822: 816: 814: 810: 805: 799: 795: 794: 786: 783: 771: 767: 760: 758: 756: 754: 752: 750: 748: 744: 737: 732: 729: 728: 724: 719: 716: 713: 710: 707: 704: 701: 698: 697: 693: 685: 682: 676: 673: 672: 671: 669: 661: 656: 653: 652: 648: 643: 640: 639: 635: 630: 627: 624: 621: 618: 615: 612: 611:Terminal Ward 609: 608: 604: 599: 596: 593: 590: 587: 584: 581: 578: 575: 572: 569: 566: 563: 560: 557: 554: 551: 548: 545: 542: 539: 536: 533: 530: 527: 524: 521: 518: 515: 512: 509: 506: 503: 500: 497: 494: 491: 488: 485: 482: 479: 476: 473: 470: 469: 468: 466: 462: 458: 454: 450: 441: 436: 434: 432: 426: 422: 420: 414: 412: 408: 404: 395: 393: 391: 385: 378: 376: 372: 370: 366: 361: 359: 355: 354: 346: 344: 340: 336: 330: 328: 324: 323: 316: 313: 307: 306: 302: 301: 294: 291: 289: 285: 284: 277: 275: 271: 266: 264: 260: 256: 251: 249: 244: 242: 238: 234: 230: 226: 225:Leonard Nimoy 221: 217: 213: 209: 205: 201: 200:Terminal Ward 196: 194: 190: 186: 182: 177: 174:Disgusted by 169: 167: 165: 164: 159: 158: 153: 148: 146: 142: 138: 134: 131: 127: 123: 119: 111: 106: 104: 102: 98: 94: 90: 86: 82: 81:Crad Kilodney 73: 69: 66: 63: 59: 55: 49: 45: 41: 31: 27: 23:Crad Kilodney 20: 1068: 1056:. 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Index

Jamaica, New York
Toronto, Ontario
University of Michigan
pen name
Canadian
Toronto, Ontario
Jamaica, New York
astronomy
University of Michigan
self-publishing
vanity press
Hicksville, New York
vanity publishing
Houston Post
The National Lampoon
National Lampoon
Watergate
Yonge Street
University of Toronto
Toronto Stock Exchange
Leonard Nimoy
William McGonagall
Karen Mac Cormack
Westbury, New York
Gwendolyn MacEwen
slush pile
crank letter
CBC Radio
Calgary Herald
Windsor Star

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