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More importantly, it is roughly 700 words for a prose article where the body is roughly 2,000 words long. There really is no scenario where a prose article should have a lead approaching a third of the length of the body—either the lead needs to be condensed further or the body needs to be expanded.
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I wish you the best of luck with this article in the future, and hope to see it renominated once the issues listed above have been addressed. In the meantime, I'll add some maintenance tags to the article.
256:, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose)
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There is some redundancy and self-contradiction in the lead. The lead should very rarely repeat information within itself—it it does, that's a sign that it should be condensed further.
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In 1973, the
Association of the Friends of Édith Piaf was formed, followed by the inauguration of the Place Édith Piaf in Belleville in 1981. Soviet astronomer
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as "the waif sparrow" or "the little waif", the infobox gives it as "The Little
Sparrow", and the body gives it as " The Waif Sparrow" or "The Little Sparrow".
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The year-span subheadings in the "Career" section are a bit dull. I might suggest subheadings along the lines of "Early career", "World War II", and so on.
280:. This could likely be fixed by judiciously merging paragraphs. I see no reason the first two paragraphs couldn't be a single paragraph, for instance.
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If even half of
Olivier Dahan's robust film about Piaf's life is true -- and let's face it, much remains shrouded in myth and mystery
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469:– the husband in question has not yet been mentioned at this point, which means the reader does not have the necessary context here.
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258:), and needs the corresponding maintenance tags. I'll list some of the specific issues I noted while reading through the article:
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Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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is roughly 13,000 words, with a lead of roughly 400 words (and for a more recently-promoted FA example,
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There are several items in the lead that I would expect to be linked, but aren't. Examples include
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518:– this is just a very clumsy way of writing it. I would suggest writing that he persuaded "her".
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The lead jumps back and forth in time a fair amount. The body does this too, to a lesser extent.
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The "Discography" and "Filmography" sections are unsourced, as is the "Biographies" subsection.
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In
October 1949, Cerdan flew from Paris to New York City to meet Piaf, however his flight was
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It has, or needs, cleanup banners that are unquestionably still valid. These include {{
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repeat the birth name (somewhat self-contradictorily) and year of birth needlessly.
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in Paris and worked with
Berteaut as a street singer around Paris and its suburbs.
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repeat information about the song and introduce a contradiction about the year.
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she accompanied her father on tours around France performing street acrobatics
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Piaf was partly raised by her paternal grandmother in
Bethandy, Normandy.
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was created at the age of twenty, when she started her singing career.
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It is a long way from meeting any one of the six good article criteria
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Leplée persuaded Piaf (then known by her birth name of Édith
Gassion)
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both introduce the stage name. "Acquited" should also be "acquitted".
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In April 1963, Piaf recorded her last song before her death, titled
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A barrage of negative media attention now threatened Piaf's career.
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which crashed while attempting to land at a stopover in
Portugal.
499:– I doubt we need to gloss "sparrow", especially if it's linked.
486:, making no point about biographies. "Despite X, Y" is textbook
440:, but there shouldn't be a dash at all when preceded by "from".
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Despite numerous biographies, much of Piaf's life is unknown.
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could be combined to avoid mention street acrobatics twice.
314:; 19 December 1915 – 10 October 1963) was a French singer
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likewise has a 400-word lead, for an 8,000-word article).
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Generally, the article needs a thorough copyediting.
220:understandable to an appropriately broad audience
356:Piaf was acquited and changed her stage name to
322:in Paris in 1915 to Annetta Giovanna Maillard.
562:– rather clumsy way of including the link to
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576:the two remained married until Piaf's death.
467:was recorded with her husband in April 1963.
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268:For one thing, it is eleven paragraphs.
570:Piaf's drug dependencies are attributed
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328:Her most widely known songs include "
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33:The following discussion is closed.
422:, right? That's what the body says.
408:The lead gives the translation of
222:; spelling and grammar are correct
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218:the prose is clear, concise, and
628:The discussion above is closed.
459:– this phrasing seems a bit odd.
370:, an acrobatic street performer.
206:}}, or similar tags (See also {{
536:This song was entered into the
594:Lyudmila Georgievna Karachkina
284:As a point of comparison, the
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457:the two conducted an affair
386:German occupation of France
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530:WP:Writing better articles
265:The lead is way too long.
212:). Specifically, it fails
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252:. All content that could
198:}} or large numbers of {{
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630:Please do not modify it.
506:Piaf took a room at the
254:reasonably be challenged
35:Please do not modify it.
508:Grand Hôtel de Clermont
482:– the source only says
336:Piaf's signature song,
444:Piaf met actor/singer
368:Louis Alphonse Gassion
320:Édith Giovanna Gassion
180:based on criterion 1 (
564:Air France Flight 009
558:Air France Flight 009
524:–this is the kind of
226:it complies with the
391:The Ed Sullivan Show
582:before passing away
538:Grammy Hall of Fame
286:WP:Featured article
366:Piaf's father was
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548:L'Homme de Berlin
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230:guidelines for
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488:WP:Synthesis
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243:), and 2b (
115:visual edit
616:TompaDompa
572:– by whom?
430:MOS:ENFROM
358:Édith Piaf
350:Édith Piaf
308:Édith Piaf
176:This is a
158:TompaDompa
59:Authorship
45:GA toolbox
602:3772 Piaf
528:language
451:MOS:SLASH
184:) and 3 (
155:Reviewer:
82:Templates
73:Reviewing
27:GA Review
596:named a
540:in 1998.
476:writing.
332:" (1946)
168:contribs
87:Criteria
495:sparrow
438:en dash
399:italics
291:Titanic
270:WP:LEAD
224:), 1b (
214:WP:GACR
204:clarify
188:cleanup
138:history
119:history
105:Article
449:– see
434:hyphen
432:. The
428:– see
420:Bernay
401:, per
310:(born
236:layout
202:}}, {{
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272:says
147:Watch
16:<
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388:and
372:and
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216:1a (
162:talk
134:edit
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192:POV
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