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582:. It should be introduced as ...Culinary Institute of America (CIA)... on first occurrence, and after that you can use CIA on its own if you want to. In this case it is particularly important, because CIA means Central Intelligence Agency to most people, and that is where CIA takes you if you type it into Knowledge (XXG).
492:
I suggested expanding it a little, and making it clearer, not tacking it on to something else. How about: "Writing about the failure of the project, the New York Times and other newspapers suggested that Copia had failed to clearly define its focus. Potential tourists were left feeling unsure whether
857:
Referring to your comment "Keep in mind this also predated my additions", a good article review is assessing the whole article, not just the bits that you personally worked on. If you nominate it for assessment, then I am afraid you take responsibility for what others may have added. I have tripped
165:
I have read through the article and it looks to be in pretty good shape. I will work through it systematically, making notes as I go, and leaving the lead until last. Please indicate when you have addressed an issue, but please do not use strikethrough, as it makes the review difficult to read at a
1014:
The lead serves to introduce the subject and summarise the article. Deciding just how long it should be is a bit of a black art, but I think it needs just a little more detail to adequately summarise the article. Perhaps you could mention Robert
Mondavi and the museum acting as a catalyst for the
467:
It's usually not recommended, however it stands alone in what it's conveying; I can't just tack it onto another paragraph that talks about something completely different. Practicality before guidelines, please. Cutting out words, the sentence says that the paper and others described the museum's
843:
Any source that actually mentions the projection of 300,000 visitors will do. It is quite important in this instance, because presumably the costings were based on projected visitors. If the projection was 30,000, they would not have invested that much money. If it was 3,000,000 then you would
181:
There are three refs with redirects (they don't necessarily need fixing) and three Napa Valley
Register refs (8, 22 and 44) are dead. Unfortunately, they are not archived on the Wayback Machine or on WebCite. (See external links in the GA
1384:
That is the review done. All in all, a well written and closely referenced article, with just a few fairly minor issues to fix. I'll put it on hold. If you need any clarification, paste it here or on my talk page. Best regards.
219:
Today there are lots of dead Napa Valley
Register refs reported. It seems to be something to do with the fact that you can only look at a fixed number of articles per month, and to view more, you need a subscription.
663:
I am not sure why you have converted acres to square miles here and further down, when room sizes are quoted in imperial and metric (square feet and m3). I suggest using acres and hectares (ha) for international
277:" This does not quite make sense to me. How about: "The museum attributed the number of visitors falling short of their projections to the depressed tourist economy stemming from the attacks." or somesuch?
974:
I was unable to check refs 44 and 45, as Napa Valley
Register wanted me to buy a subscription. However, most of the refs are used correctly, so I have assumed that these two are also used correctly.
746:
This was all taken from reference 20, well before my work on the article. However, the less-rounded and generally higher numbers, and more-cited numbers are usually the ones to go with. Fixing.
454:
The New York Times and other newspapers described the museum's lack of focus and broad or unclear concept between serving as a museum, cooking school, and promotional center for wine
1523:
372:
I strongly prefer the current phrasing here, it seems to flow better. American
English perhaps uses fewer constructions of that nature, instead preferring the use of apostrophes.
1015:
development of downtown Napa in the first paragraph, with the farmer's market, Napa Valley
College getting the books, and the Smithsonian getting Julia's utensils in the second.
547:. The abbreviation CIA is introduced without a proper definition. It needs to be ...Culinary Institute of America (CIA)... earlier, so we know it is not a clandestine school.
80:
325:
I speak
English, not American; please don't misuse these terms. I'm going to tweak the sentence, however "at the suggestion of" implies more than what's asserted here.
70:
47:
819:
Honestly information needs to be verifiable (able to be verified), it is not usually required to have a citation. Keep in mind this also predated my additions.
1526:
page. I have put it under "Food and Drink
Companies", since that seems to be a slightly better fit than most of the other options, but am open to suggestions.
816:
844:
suspect the whole basis for building it was flawed. As it was, they over-estimated the number of people who would turn up by a significant margin.
126:
1399:
Thanks so much. I am crazy busy working in a restaurant among other things; can you keep holding until I have proper time to respond? Thank you
774:
Ref 4 is used to support " In 2005, Copia sold 3.5 acres (0.0055 sq mi) to
Intrawest for construction of a Westin hotel" but does not appear to.
193:
working for me. I just saved them in the
Internet Archive, so even if you couldn't view them before, you should be able to find them on IA now.
1056:
275:
The museum attributed its high projected attendance falling short partially due to the depressed tourist economy stemming from the attacks.
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620:
Suggest adding a date, rather than "recently", as such terms are soon outdated, and the reader has no way of knowing when it was assessed.
52:
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Ref 9 does not appear to support "Mondavi chose the downtown Napa location, with urging from his wife, who raised her children there".
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Ref 10 quotes $ 55M startup with $ 70M bond. The article states $ 50M startup and $ 78M bond. (Ref 19 uses $ 55M and $ 78M)
1504:
As all of the issues raised have now been addressed, I am awarding Good Article status to this article. Congratulations.
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Ref 20 does not cover "The museum closed on Friday, November 21, 2008". It just says November. (Refs 21 or 22 might do)
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Again, is "Copia had $ 68 million in debt" good American? I suggest "Copia had debts of £68 million" or similar.
554:
It's mentioned prominently in the previous sentence, so I wouldn't see why this should be necessary, but okay.
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Ref 15 does not cover "Original projections of 300,000 admissions per year were never met". It needs a source.
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over this one once or twice myself in articles that I have nominated, but it is just part of the process.
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Done, though the farmers' market has already moved elsewhere, so it's not important enough for the lede.
238:
This is always avoidable if you use an incognito window. Then you can view as many articles as you want.
1360:
Hey, thanks for reviewing this! I'll look over and reply to your comments more when I get home tonight.
580:
Knowledge (XXG):Manual_of_Style#Write_out_both_the_full_version_and_the_abbreviation_at_first_occurrence
166:
later date, and it is an important record of why the article was/was not awarded good article status.
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good American? It isn't good English. How about ...at the suggestion of his wife... or somesuch?
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What are the refs with redirects? I only found one using the tool. Also, refs 8, 22, and 44
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unclear concept between serving as a museum and promotional center. Does that make sense?
460:, and it doesn't quite make sense. See if you can expand it a little, and make it clearer.
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they were visiting a museum, a cooking school, or a promotional center for wine."
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First pass done. I have got the references to check next, and then the lead.
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It's on the third page of the online version of the newspaper article.
402:
At the time, Copia had $ 68 ($ 74.7 million today) million in debt.
939:
Ref 26 does not cover "but their effort failed". (Ref 28 does)
1423:
No problem. I will keep checking the page from time to time.
456:
is a single sentence paragraph, which is not recommended by
1522:
I am a bit unsure which subsection to list it under on the
1524:
Knowledge (XXG):Good_articles/Agriculture,_food_and_drink
406:...Copia had $ 68 million ($ 74.7 million today) in debt.
134:
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417:(with debts of $ 80 million ($ 87.9 million today))
413:(with $ 80 ($ 87.9 million today) million in debt)
981:See above mention of using an incognito window.
8:
1287:(images are tagged and non-free images have
618:it was recently assessed for $ 21.3 million.
30:
61:
33:
872:You're right, I'm adding a reference.
7:
1549:I think that's appropriate. Thanks!
817:Which source do you want me to cite?
1437:Okay! Finally have time to reply.
1282:, where possible and appropriate.
545:the CIA's new Food Business School
24:
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1236:Fair representation without bias
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1065:for what the criteria are, and
781:Paragraphs 17 and 19 of ref 4.
316:...with urging from his wife...
361:seems a bit clumsy. How about
359:...local residents' support...
1:
363:support by local residents...
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309:Conception and construction
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1569:23:55, 21 March 2016 (UTC)
1536:22:57, 21 March 2016 (UTC)
1514:22:42, 21 March 2016 (UTC)
1497:23:13, 20 March 2016 (UTC)
1457:18:12, 20 March 2016 (UTC)
1433:00:03, 12 March 2016 (UTC)
1419:00:32, 11 March 2016 (UTC)
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527:23:13, 20 March 2016 (UTC)
1395:23:33, 3 March 2016 (UTC)
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1355:22:48, 1 March 2016 (UTC)
1001:02:05, 4 March 2016 (UTC)
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868:00:26, 5 March 2016 (UTC)
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392:01:38, 4 March 2016 (UTC)
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161:21:43, 1 March 2016 (UTC)
404:It would read better as
400:Something is wrong with
1076:reasonably well written
425:I fixed these, thanks.
1301:(appropriate use with
1069:for what they are not)
353:Decline and bankruptcy
1276:It is illustrated by
1228:neutral point of view
1196:broad in its coverage
507:That's good, thanks!
1289:fair use rationales
411:Similar issue with
18:Talk:Copia (museum)
1260:No edit wars, etc.
1187:See comments above
1136:factually accurate
1127:See comments above
1303:suitable captions
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415:. Suggest
284:Reworded.
268:Background
48:Authorship
34:GA toolbox
1328:Pass/Fail
1213:(focused)
539:Aftermath
458:WP:LAYOUT
144:Reviewer:
71:Templates
62:Reviewing
27:GA Review
664:readers.
182:toolbox)
157:contribs
76:Criteria
1322:Overall
1111:fiction
1083:(prose)
946:Fixed.
911:Fixed.
127:history
108:history
94:Article
1279:images
1254:stable
1252:It is
1230:policy
1194:It is
1134:It is
1113:, and
1103:layout
1074:It is
1059:review
671:Okay.
627:Done.
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