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thanks so much for your speedy review. I was up all night working on this before I nominated it, and was planning on proof-reading it in the morning with a fresh set of eyes as I wasn't expecting it to get a review for weeks if not months, so sorry of there were more typos than you're used to haha. I
236:"During this period Linda gives birth to their first child, Brandon, which helps to assuage a reconciliation with Linda's mother". The "during this period" feels unnecessary, the sentence "While he is temporarily paralyzed" surmises that she gives birth during this time well enough.
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either "until getting into a violent brawl with four of the cooks" or merge the next sentence with it to "until a violent brawl with four of the cooks results in his firing". If the latter, restructure the line about the owner loaning him money as a separate
189:"It also focuses on the relationship between Bruce and his wife, Linda Lee Cadwell, and the racism Bruce was subjected to, typical of behaviour towards Asian in the U.S. at the time." Asian should have an s at the end or be rewritten as "Asian people".
232:"Bruce defeats Johnny Sun in a secretive, no-holds-barred honor match, but an embittered Sun attacks Bruce after he has already admitted defeat. Sun's cowardly attack results in a debilitating back injury for Lee" -: -->
216:"Bruce is a U.S. citizen as he was born in San Francisco, California, when his father was a performer touring there." feels a little unnecessary in my opinion. His being born in San Francisco is not prudent to the plot.
243:"Bruce is approached by manager Bill Krieger, who offers him the role of Kato in the television series The Green Hornet. Bruce and Krieger work together and create the idea for the Kung Fu television series" -: -->
322:"In the film Bruce travels to the U.S. in steerage, though Cohen acknowledges that was inaccurate and was used to show the appalling conditions that most Chinese people endured in emigrating at the time" -: -->
233:"Bruce defeats Johnny Sun in a secretive, no-holds-barred honor match, but a (resentful, spiteful) Sun attacks Bruce after he has already admitted defeat, resulting in a debilitating back injury for Lee".
244:"Bruce is approached by manager Bill Krieger, who offers him the role of Kato in the television series The Green Hornet. The pair also work together to create the idea for the Kung Fu television series".
213:"In a nightmare, Bruce Lee's father sees a terrifying phantom, known as the Demon, haunting a young Bruce Lee" I feel the second use of Bruce Lee should either become just Bruce, or be rephrased to son.
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224:"While studying philosophy in college, he begins to teach martial arts classes, where he meets Linda. They marry in defiance of Linda's racist mother" -: -->
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225:"While studying philosophy in college, he begins to teach martial arts classes, where he meets Linda, marrying her in defiance of Linda's racist mother".
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in the lead section to align with the billing order in the billing block but that’s a very quick fix and shouldn’t block the pass. Very good work.
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was inaccurate and was used to show the appalling conditions that most
Chinese people endured in emigrating at the time".
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That should be all of the issues I have. I'll look through again in a week's time. Until then work on these.
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is in the billing block and the infobox, she should be listed with the other names in the lead section.
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think I've addressed everything now. No rush, but have another look when you get a chance. :)
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Some pictures would be nice. Perhaps in filming an image of
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Will take this one on. Give me a bit to look over the page.
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240:"which leads to a reconciliation with Linda's mother".
219:"until a violent brawl with four of the cooks" -: -->
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Looks solid. There is an errant n in this sentence: "
420:Fixed the order. Thanks again for your review. :)
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337:Ensure any sources that can be archived are.
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355:in Critical reception could work too.
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228:"an embittered Sun" -: -->
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349:University of Washington
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287:in the Cast section.
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312:Looks good to me.
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81:Instructions
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270:The Waltons
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104:visual edit
401:Nancy Kwan
399:. I think
332:References
263:Production
194:Nancy Kwan
48:Authorship
34:GA toolbox
292:Hong Kong
285:Rob Cohen
221:sentence.
144:Reviewer:
71:Templates
62:Reviewing
27:GA Review
275:Include
76:Criteria
307:Release
254:Delink
127:history
108:history
94:Article
180:Dragon
290:Link
136:Watch
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