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reported that 11% of the population, 1.63 million people, are suffering from food shortages), as well as expanding the information about the 2005 food crisis. After the 2005 food crisis, Malawi was on the rise and even had a surplus of maize for some years; interventions by the
Malawian government and international organizations (primarily fertilizer subsidy programs for farmers) have allowed Malawi to recover. Recently, however, due to periods of flooding and drought (among other causes), the maize yield has been dangerously low and the food shortage has returned.
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statements like “some,” “others,” or “many.” Who are these people? Where is the evidence for the statement “many?” How many? For example, you say that there were many human rights violations during Banda’s reign- what were these? Another area is the first sentence of the “climatological” section, where you say that “Some have suggested...” Who are “some?” I think this would be a good place for an in-text citation. There are a lot of places where you say “some” or “others” (such as the beginning of the “Culture and society” section) and more specificity is needed.
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Great contribution to the topic. Overall, you provided depth on the different aspects of this crisis (i.e. Economical, Climatological, Social, etc.). I think that you used data very well throughout the article. Some minor improvements would be adding more blue links throughout the beginning of the
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I would really appreciate any feedback on this proposed outline as I move forward. An anonymous commenter previously noted that Malawi’s agriculture increased dramatically in 2008, and that school attendance was up. I had not previously thought of the relationship between school attendance and the
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I plan on updating this article as part of my work as a
Poverty, Justice, and Human Capabilities minor at Rice University. As others have noted, this article’s information is out of date. I plan on updating it with more recent information about the current food crisis in Malawi (in 2013, the UN
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Great contribution so far! I appreciate your focus on context, and the valuable text, pictures, and external links that you have added. I just have a few areas where I think you could make some revisions. First, one thing your article would benefit from is increased specificity. You often make
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Excuse me, but I just saw on the news that Malawi has dramatically increased agriculture recently, and is now exporting food to its neighbors. School attendance is up, and people are feeling good about the future. Why doesn't the article reflect this change?
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Along these lines, I think your article could also benefit from more in-text citations. You have a lot of statistics; it would be good to say where a few of them came from in the actual text, as it establishes credibility with readers.
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in Spring 2014. Further details were available on the "Education
Program:Rice University/ Human Development in Global and Local Communities, Section 2 (Spring 2014)" page, which is now unavailable on the
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article. Another aspect to improve would be your citations/references. I think simply acknowledging who said what would be very beneficial for the readers. Also, I really appreciated the reference to
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food crisis (although clearly there is one), and I would love any feedback or suggestions on how to integrate that and other social/cultural effects of the food crisis into my article.
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That's something my professor also brought up, so I plan on renaming the first section to "Background and factors involved." Thanks for the feedback!
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I realize that the political, economic, and social causes of the food crisis are interrelated, and so I will address that in the article.
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I plan on discussing the food crisis from the early 2000s as well as the current one. My proposed outline for this article is as follows:
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So, just a few things to fix- your contribution is great!!
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for additional information. I made the following changes:
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As for school attendance and food supply, be careful -
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