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I am new to this process as this is my first GA review, although I have taken a number of articles through the GA process, and have followed the process carefully, so I hope to be fair and thorough. The good article guidelines will form the basis for my assessment. I am aware that the article failed
1010:
I am happy with the lead. It introduces the subject, and summarises the contents quite well. I have changed one sentence to improve the flow of the language. I'm not in favour of striking things out, as it makes it difficult to read and the review is an important record of the process. However, I
697:
I see what you mean. I got the longitude wrong (142E instead of 142W) and Oboe was about as far away from Korea as you can get while staying in the northern
Pacific. I dropped a couple of maps onto Wikimedia, on which I plotted the positions, (see
180:
I have read the article several times, and started to check some of the refs. I will make notes on the content as I go, and will assess the lead at the end, following which I will formally assess it against the good article criteria.
242:
Some clarification needed. Did the merchant vessels radio their observations to the weather ships, who then forwarded them? ie did weather ships collect observations from merchant vessels, which were reported to them by radio?
940:. It is not clear if this is the ships or the observations. Ref 3 could do with a page number (p.9), which indicates that it is the number of ships participating in the scheme that has declined. Could be a bit clearer.
1011:
have marked the sections where all concerns have been addressed. There remain a couple to do, but I think we are nearly there. I am now away until 3 April, so will fill in the formal review as soon as I get back.
816:
This representation clearly shows that the vast ocean areas of the southern hemisphere are not covered by a similar observing system. It will be a future task to find an adequate and economical solution for this
269:. Again, clarification needed. Did the beacon allow the plane to find the ship, because the plane did not know where it was, or did the beacon allow a plane which had ditched in the sea to be located?
636:
Pacific weather ship A ("Able") was renamed ship P ("Peter") and moved 200 miles (320 km) to the east-northeast in
December 1949. Pacific weather vessel F ("Fox") was renamed N ("Nan")
680:
Was vessel Oboe moved because of the perceived security risk of the Korean war? Some indication that ship Sugar was further north and much further east might provide some context.
80:
450:
ref 8 mentions a specific cause (the loss of a PanAm flight) which acted as a catalyst to the setting up of the network, and would be a useful addition to the article.
683:
While a good guess, since it's not referenceable, I don't think we can add that information. I did some digging after the first GAN review, and revealed nothing new.
918:
Was vessel C the one that reduced the total from 9 to 8, or was this a further reduction? If the first, I suggest joining the two sentences to make it more obvious.
70:
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529:
I have made a couple of edits, to remove the large number of "operated"s in the first para. Please feel free to improve my selection of alternative words.
469:
The jump from the German boats to the 327-foot coastguard cutters is not obvious. Presumably, the cutters were
American? This needs to be clearer.
332:. There is an article on him, so I have wikilinked it, but he needs context. Ref 14 mentions he was an aircraft designer. This could be added.
126:
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615:
The ultimate location of the weather ships is located in the table by latitude and longitude. Added your maps to the article as well.
1275:
220:. I am not used to this word in this context, so presume it is a technical term, and so needs a simple explanation on first occurence.
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608:. Why was it forced? Were they moved to improve coverage? Also, in the absence of a map, some help with location would be good. So,
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does not read well. Some rewording would be good. Also, very short sentences, here. Try some conjunctions, to make it flow better.
107:
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610:
in the North
Atlantic (or wherever), weather vessel F ... and so ships D and E were repositioned to maintain the coverage
189:
This seems to be the weakest part of the article. I have made some minor copy edits, but it still needs some attention.
1099:
990:
Responded to a number of them. For the issues you feel are dealt with, strike them out so I know what issues remain.
1140:
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1040:
I have made one further change to the 1940s section, and am also happy that all points raised have been addressed.
223:
It is. Synoptic hours are merely midnight, 6 am, noon, and 6 pm
Greenwich Mean Time (Universal Coordinated Time)
585:
The five
Weather Bureau employees who were based on board the vessels worked between 40 and 63 hours each week.
975:
Just the lead to go. It seems like quite a lot so far, but most of them are easily fixed I think. Back soon.
899:. Does this mean that there has been a planned replacement of ships by weather buoys? Could be made clearer.
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Ref 24 does not suggest that ships were prohibitively expensive, only that they were much more expensive.
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a previous review recently, but am also aware that a lot of improvements have been made since that time.
642:, to avoid too much repetition of Pacific. I have made this change, but again, you may want to tweak it.
640:
In the
Pacific, weather ship A ... was renamed ... and moved, while weather vessel F ... was renamed ...
1026:
I think I've responded to all the remaining comments now. Let me know if I haven't when you get back.
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The reference does not clarify this. I'll see if I can find a reference that does specify it.
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The work weeks for the five
Weather Bureau employees aboard the vessels totaled 40 to 63 hours.
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Weather vessel F ("Fox") was discontinued ... which forced a subsequent change in location ...
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It took me a while to figure this out, because it is now ref 9. The phrase has been added.
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Weather ships also reported observations from merchant vessels, which were reported by radio.
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Better than the previous section, but one or two issues. I have made some copyedits.
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Royal Navy needs to be more clearly linked with corvettes rather than stations, and
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See if that clarifies the situation. Added the page number (by my count page 2).
1324:
Congratulations on an interesting article. I am passing this as a good article.
572:. I presume the US Weather Bureau made the plan, so this should be clarified.
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Should I reword what I have? Maybe interest was too strong of a word.
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349:. Needs rewording, since a pilot balloon is unmanned, if the link to
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their role had been largely superseded by weather buoys by design
792:
There was an interest in deploying more ships south of the
198:. It would be helpful to know who they were reported to.
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to operate their two stations, previously used by the
426:
due to its value ... due to an international agreement
797:
does not appear to be supported by ref 20. (now 21).
544:, and composed of a crew of 53 Met Office personnel.
201:
Specified where the information is radioed back to.
747:As a result of these changes, ship N was moved ...
743:These changes caused ship N ("Nan") to move ...
8:
1274:(images are tagged and non-free images have
583:This seems a bit clunky. Try something like
723:needs some more words to make good sense.
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938:which have decreased in number since 1985
814:Not entirely convinced. The text says:
800:Check the second paragraph of page 14.
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472:Specified that they were US vessels.
7:
1269:, where possible and appropriate.
751:Changed line per your suggestion.
702:) which you might consider using.
24:
721:offshore northern Baja California
548:station ... composed of a crew...
400:three of the four ships were sunk
347:to take ... pilot balloon flights
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196:and report them via radio...
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169:21:37, 28 March 2011 (UTC)
155:21:37, 28 March 2011 (UTC)
1334:23:07, 3 April 2011 (UTC)
1056:22:57, 3 April 2011 (UTC)
1036:00:08, 1 April 2011 (UTC)
819:Have I missed something?
463:00:07, 1 April 2011 (UTC)
436:, to make it flow better.
745:Suggest something like,
612:, or something similar.
536:The United Kingdom used
1081:reasonably well written
1288:(appropriate use with
1263:It is illustrated by
1223:neutral point of view
1191:broad in its coverage
1046:Now the formal bit.
1276:fair use rationales
1251:No edit wars, etc.
1136:factually accurate
902:Tried to clarify.
880:Dealt with issue.
1290:suitable captions
700:Talk:Weather ship
360:Should be fixed.
263:could activate a
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117:Article talk
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81:Instructions
1112:word choice
634:Similarly,
589:Reworded.
491:Back soon.
381:changed to
353:is correct.
304:Back soon.
104:visual edit
1141:verifiable
1028:Thegreatdr
992:Thegreatdr
945:Thegreatdr
923:Thegreatdr
904:Thegreatdr
882:Thegreatdr
870:Fading Use
835:Thegreatdr
802:Thegreatdr
753:Thegreatdr
728:Thegreatdr
685:Thegreatdr
617:Thegreatdr
591:Thegreatdr
555:Thegreatdr
542:Royal Navy
525:Late 1940s
474:Thegreatdr
455:Thegreatdr
411:Thegreatdr
409:Reworded.
362:Thegreatdr
274:Thegreatdr
248:Thegreatdr
225:Thegreatdr
203:Thegreatdr
48:Authorship
34:GA toolbox
1311:Pass/Fail
1208:(focused)
967:addressed
861:addressed
775:addressed
664:addressed
638:could be
538:corvettes
516:addressed
296:addressed
144:Reviewer:
71:Templates
62:Reviewing
27:GA Review
629:Reworded
185:Function
76:Criteria
1305:Overall
1116:fiction
1088:(prose)
817:region.
794:equator
127:history
108:history
94:Article
1266:images
1245:stable
1243:It is
1225:policy
1189:It is
1134:It is
1118:, and
1108:layout
1079:It is
1068:review
921:Done.
319:Origin
1120:lists
1070:(see
784:1960s
673:1950s
575:done.
339:done.
136:Watch
16:<
1330:talk
1138:and
1104:lead
1102:for
1072:here
1052:talk
1032:talk
1017:talk
1006:Lead
996:talk
981:talk
949:talk
927:talk
908:talk
886:talk
839:talk
825:talk
806:talk
757:talk
732:talk
708:talk
689:talk
649:done
621:talk
595:talk
559:talk
497:talk
478:talk
459:talk
443:done
415:talk
392:done
366:talk
310:talk
278:talk
252:talk
229:talk
207:talk
165:talk
151:talk
123:edit
100:edit
1100:MoS
432:to
430:due
1332:)
1313::
1307::
1294::
1286:b
1280::
1272:a
1253::
1247:.
1233::
1227:.
1210::
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1200::
1196:a
1193:.
1179::
1175:OR
1171:c
1165::
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1151::
1147:a
1144:.
1124::
1114:,
1110:,
1106:,
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1090::
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1066:GA
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