102:"Interestingly, he also supports the use of air marshals on commercial flights, highlighting the fact that Biafra's beliefs challenge both liberal and conservative politics." How does this emphasize a split with both liberalism and conservatism? No left-wingers nor right-wingers who I know are opposed to having air marshals on flights. For that matter, why is this noted with the word "interestingly", implying that there is widespread opposition to the practice?
965:
I've changed that one sentence. However, I don't know how to be sure what you count as passive and what you don't. You could list some sentences that need work (there probably isn't too many), or you could change them yourself. Either way, it helps more than claiming opposition to something you won't
1147:
Where exactly are the events out of order? Also, neither you nor the previous objector have explained why "disbandment" is akward. And if there are any lines other than "cam up with" (which I just changed) that need to be changed, please state them instead of claiming they exist in an ambiguous way.
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American
Hardcore was cited by Tuf-Kat, which seems like a pretty good book to me (I read a little bit of it at Newbury Comics once, but didn't bother to buy it). There's probably more in that book that we could use, though we don't really need more from it at the moment. More photos of Biafra would
1072:
or an article on the scene in general rather than this article: "The city's younger bands adopt extravagantly repellent names (Dead
Kennedys, Woundz, Toiling Midgets) and write extravagantly provocative lyrics." Robert Palmer, "The Pop Life; Rebellion Rules Rock In Young San Francisco" . New York
621:
DKs at least once played the
Showbox in Seattle, definitely the premier punk venue here at that time, now somewhat glitzed up and probably wouldn't book a band with their potential for trouble. But to a large extent, they were pioneers of the DIY booking route, with amateur and semi-pro organizers
496:
I still think some sort of documentation of popularity is important. The only mention of a charting single doesn't put that fact in historical context by mentioning that it was unusual, or how unusual it was. The article needs something by which to gauge relative popularity -- if not sales and
1116:
There is a rather long chapter on Biafra in that book (actually on the DKs, but talking about him specifically a lot). If there's any specific suggestions of something to add, I can look it up, but I glanced through the book when originally commenting on it, and didn't see anything of obvious
1133:
rambles quite too much and the flow of events is unnecessarily out of order(eg late 70s events are before early 70s).....many awkward phrases(eg "bands disbandment")...too much colloquialism (eg "came up with") ...sounds like author is trying to write like his subject would write, not very
98:
with "Holiday in
Cambodia"..." The boldfaced phrases need to be justified somehow. Obviously, a listing on the pop charts would not be a relevant metric for judging popularity in this case. So how should we identify "California Über Alles" and "Holiday in Cambodia" as being popular and
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Jello's AMG entry says that it was skinheads; the RS article I cited just calls them slamdancers. I mentioned in the article that Creton was slamdancing. If we have to change it to add any specific group for them, "skinheads" will win out for now as we have one source that claims
750:
By the way, thanks for the
Garofalo source; I was looking through the same book (though my edition is newer) for something to add. However, you didn't add any page numbers for that or the other source (which should come with any book reference). Could you please add those in? --
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from that month or two there will be a story on this, and there might be other solid sources to be found. I wouldn't stop it from becoming a featured article over that, but I had retreated to a vaguer wording precisely because there was disagreement on this and no source
80:"Biafra believes the trial was politically motivated; it was often reported that the PMRC took Biafra to court as a cost effective way of sending a message out to other musicians who have "offensive" content in their music." Both of these statements need to be cited.
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be able to come up with something from radio stations that publish their playlists to show that both songs still get airplay 25 years after the fact. Here are two web searches that turned up examples for
Seattle stations recently playing "California Über
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was the first single by the Dead
Kennedys, "California Über Alles". The song, which spoofed California governor Jerry Brown, would be the first of many political songs by the group and Biafra. Not long afterward, the Dead Kennedys made a second and
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2, 3 (mentions only UK charting of "Too Drunk to Fuck", which may be his only charting hit (I don't know), but some measure of recording sales or concert sales or something ought to be added -- recording sales could be worked into the
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and referencing (ex. "Biafra's spoken word work has been less influential to other artists than his music. However, Biafra's spoken word is often mentioned by Sean
Kennedy as being a major influence on his work." and others mentioned
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I rewrote the last paragraph; let me know if it needs more work. As for the music issue, I just added a reference for "Holiday in
Cambodia", which calls it "possibly the most successful single of the American hardcore scene". --
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Biafra himself rarely plays an instrument. The article does mention his composition method, which seems to be the most important detail of his own instrumental style (his colaborators tend to add their own style into his
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There are audio links at the bottom of the article to free, legal copies of full spoken word speeches. Check the
External links section. As for music, would links to mp3s at Alternative Tentacles's website work?
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Oh, forgot about that one. Still, for someone known primarily as a musician, I'd expect something more on his musical career in the lead. It's supposed to be a summary of the article, which is mostly about
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As I mentioned below, independent music's success isn't judged the same as the RIAA stuff. There isn't really a Billboard Top 100 Indie Chart (I could be wrong, but I know that there wasn't one back then).
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The DKs were quite apposed to arenas (with the exception of the Bay Area Music Awards incident, which I've left to the DK article). As for nightclubs, the only one I can think of a the moment is the
309:, notes and references should be merged into one notes and references section and fixed so that the numbers in text have a corresponding numbered note. For multiple notes from the name source, use
33:
Self-nomination. This article has been worked on extensively in order to push it to feature quality. All previous complaints about it have been resolved, and I believe it is ready now. --
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There's a Rolling Stone reference. As for scholarly, there's none at the moment, but I could break out my old History of Rock & Roll college text book and add something from there.
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The air marshal comment is gone now. I didn't add that myself, and I was planning on removing it if someone felt it didn't belong (as I didn't like the fact that the quote was uncited).
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I would willingly add a few audio samples from my collection (I can give a fair number of them), though I'll need some info on how to do so within Knowledge (XXG)'s fair use rules. --
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I'd be fine with ditching the 2nd photo, but the 1st one stays, as it was taken by a Knowledge (XXG) member. It's worth noting that pictures are not required for a featured article.
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that the style is "inarticulate". I suggest that it simply could use some polishing. Leaving aside whether the word "disbandment" is inherently awkward, I'll give another example:
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needs a fair use rationale. Also, you need to say more about the video the screencap came from (was it from a live Dead Kennedys show, or an interview, or something else? And when?)
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I think all of them count as socially conscious lyricism; maybe we could be more specific on them (for instance, "Yuppie Cadillac" represents Biafra's belief in banning SUVs). --
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The problem with the last paragraph is it looks like something a 14-year-old wrote for his English class. It's a marked contrast to the more decriptive paragrpahs preceding it.
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Holiday in Cambodia is taken care of for now; as for CUA, I've added the covers to the article. I'm not sure how we'd go about citing radio station playlists, though. --
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I'd like to see us sort out whether it was skinheads, "crusties" or whoever who beat him up in the incident outside Gilman Street. I suspect that if someone tracks down
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placing ads on phone poles and taking 2-column-inch ads in the local weekly papers, and with the band generally playing to impressively large crowds in rented halls. -
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is considered one of the most successful hardcore albums, and it peaked at #100). Underground music's popularity isn't really measured the same way as the RIAA stuff.
940:
Going through the article changing almost every instance of passive voice would improve the prose. I hope that this provides a better idea of what needs polishing.
71:"Jello Biafra came up with his name as an ironic combination of a non-nutritionally valued corporate food product and mass starvation." This needs to be footnoted.
124:
Footnoting it would make the second paragraph a bit small. Also, the sentence before it is used to explain that one; moving it would make the paragraph ackward.
890:
In response to your request for expanding on prose concerns below, I suggest that using only words that exist doesn't by itself make for "brilliant prose", a
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A spoken word tour of Canada was cancelled because of this, and recordings for a spoken word album that Biafra had planned to record during it were not made.
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I personally don't think we need a sub-article for his discography (it's big, but not that big). There are links to the other albums he did with his bands.
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There's a lot of description of Biafra's lyrics, but the only clue as to what the actual instrumentation (of the Dead Kennedys) sounds like is "punk rock".
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charts, how about touring locations/audiences? Did the Dead Kennedys play at local nightclubs, regional theaters and festivals, or arenas and Superbowls?
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As for the Sean Kennedy part, he mentions that in several episodes of his show. It kind of counts as common knowledge (at least for fans of SK). --
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3 (lead could use another paragraph, or even just a couple sentences, I suggest including something that indicates one or more of the ways he meets
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I have added a reference for Sean Kennedy now (and from his own show). Also, all previous requests for references have been taken care of. --
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50:- Before folks complain about the "lists" (the discography), I should note that for a subject like Mr. Biafra, it's quite important. --
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The Dead Kennedys toured widely in California in the early 1970s, eventually moving on to major club across the country, including
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Asserting the popularity of "Holiday in Cambodia" and "California über Alles" is still a problem. You are correct to say that
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articulate.....still my hat is off to this author for writing a good article about a topic no one will remember in 30 years.
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I know the Jelvins played at The Middle East Downstairs in Boston on October 21; the Boston Phoenix has an article on that
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By the way, would it be ok for me to add a link to the full mp3 of "Yuppie Cadillac" at Alternative Tentacles' website? --
786:
Looks good. I have one last suggestion on the clips -- more informative captions would be very helpful (e.g. "Song" from
731:
403:, this article only describes his lyrics and says "punk rock", AFAICT -- just a paragraph or two under "Music" would help)
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I'm not sure of where to get the info for sales; hardcore didn't exactly make the Billboard 100 that often (Black Flag's
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Personally, I've always thought that method was rather messy. Normal publications don't mix footnotes with citations. --
83:"How this alleged harm was discovered and the authorities' decision to press charges were disallowed by the judge." What?
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I've added samples for the DKs and Lard. I'll try to get something in for the Jelvins and a spoken word clip soon. --
86:"Biafra opposed Levi's due to his belief that they use unfair business practices and sweatshop labor." Needs citation.
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Which reminds me: has anyone tried digging up contemporary gig reviews? One possibly citable quote, though maybe for
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Contains at least one member who was once a part of or later joined a band that is otherwise extremely notable
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The above is certainly not "inarticulate". But it isn't "brilliant"ly easy to parse. I'd suggest a rewrite:
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subpage -- Dead Kennedys studio albums seem more relevant here than a guest appearance on an Offspring album)
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I've also got at least one book that covers the Dead Kennedys in general, and probably Biafra in particular.
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It's definitely the best thing I've ever seen written about Biafra since that Goldmine article back in '89.
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And while I appreciate the congratulation, there isn't really a need to insult Biafra in the process. --
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I'll work on those tomorrow, assuming I'm not too busy; otherwise they'll be in within the next few days.
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848:. I'd recommend asking someone who hasn't seen the article to go through it and give it a copyedit.
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Oh, oops, misread that. It would still be valuable to note international success, if there was any.
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It might be worth mentioning whether or not Biafra has ever performed outside of the US. Was his
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I removed the odd statement about the judge (apperantly someone added that when I wasn't looking).
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The DKs never made it onto TofP; they didn't rank high enough on the singles chart to appear. --
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For comprehensiveness, I'm not sure exactly what you'd like added. Could you elaborate on that?
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The attack derailed Biafra's plans for both a Canadian spoken-word tour and accompanying album.
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about the Bay Area Punk scene. Anyone seen it? Anything to it? Some great early DKs photos—
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Looks nice, though I think the Dead Kennedy studio albums ought to be included here as well.
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How about adding something to the "Early years and the Dead Kennedys" section, similar to:
235:, another case of being covered by someone from far afield musically. On both of these, we
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Times, Aug 25, 1982. p. C19 I rather like that "extravagantly repellent names". --
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be nice too, though it might be hard to get some that we can use under fair use.
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as such or the Bay Area hardcore scene, but we don't cite anything of the sort.
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The citation for the trial is there too now. It fits both parts of the sentence.
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too. For festivals, Rock Against Reagan was probably their biggest appearance (
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I've just handled your screenshot complaint. Let me know if it needs more work.
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I don't see any reason not to. Just make it clear that it's an external link.
422:, more free pics would be nice, but probably impossible or difficult to find)
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I'm not sure what you mean about the last paragraph. Please elaborate. --
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The lead was expanded a bit more; by your criteria, it should work now.
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As for the Music section, it does contain more than just his style. --
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is an example of Biafra's socially conscious lyricism, or "Song" from
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now, on the assumption that some sound samples are uploaded. See
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It helps, but there ought to be some uploaded to Knowledge (XXG).
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The last paragraph (before the discography) is really poor prose.
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Problems can not be fixed if you do not state what they are.
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Surely by now there is at least one good book on either the
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3 (while musical style may be more appropriate in detail at
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I didn't say anything about ditching any photos, just that
450:(consider changing "music" to "Lyrical and musical style"?)
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For "California Über Alles", we could mention the cover by
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but you do not propose any alternate means of measuring it.
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3 (apparently only includes solo work? Consider making a
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the two fair use ones need rationales on the image pages.
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4 (print and scholarly references would be very good)
147:There's now a reference for the Levi's comment. --
894:requirement. That said, I strongly disagree with
734:for an example of a fair use clip with rationale.
1105:preceded it as an announcement of the event). --
370:, but I think it's fixable during the FAC period.
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1052:says McCaffrey co-authored a 1979 book titled
679:appearance a total aberration in that regard?
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135:I'll address the rest in a little while. --
18:Knowledge (XXG):Featured article candidates
606:in New York, as well as performing at the
472:. The intro mentions the Dead Kennedys.
657:I'll try to add that in somewhere. --
732:Image:Neutral Milk Hotel - 2 Head.ogg
612:(possibly split into two sentences).
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843:. Prose issues (ex. "disbandment")
576:. I'm pretty sure they played the
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1050:http://www.richardmccaffrey.com/
1007:I've changed things around. --
448:Format/Style - looks very good
225:Disposable Heroes Of Hiphoprisy
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861:Disbandment is a legit word.
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347:I'm with LGagnon on this. -
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248:— and "Holiday In Cambodia"—
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75:Image:Jellobiafradkdays.jpg
64:This is a good start, but--
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420:need fair use rationales
966:explain completely. --
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1130:
1117:importance.
1103:this article
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1041:forthcoming.
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410:discography)
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229:John Linnell
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95:
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52:CJ Marsicano
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43:
32:
28:Jello Biafra
896:User:Anlace
726:Conditional
1030:3 comments
427:1, 2, 3, 4
324:note_label
89:"Biafra's
666:Done. --
368:right now
314:ref_label
99:relevant?
1054:X-capees
610:festival
425:Audio -
407:Sales -
391:WP:MUSIC
382:criteria
1153:LGagnon
1119:Tuf-Kat
1107:LGagnon
1009:LGagnon
968:LGagnon
875:LGagnon
866:LGagnon
823:Tuf-Kat
814:LGagnon
805:LGagnon
796:Tuf-Kat
779:LGagnon
762:Tuf-Kat
753:LGagnon
736:Tuf-Kat
728:support
699:Tuf-Kat
690:LGagnon
681:Tuf-Kat
668:LGagnon
659:LGagnon
614:Tuf-Kat
589:LGagnon
549:Tuf-Kat
540:LGagnon
491:Damaged
455:Tuf-Kat
387:Lead -
340:LGagnon
307:Comment
289:LGagnon
240:Alles"—
216:LGagnon
164:LGagnon
149:LGagnon
137:LGagnon
62:Oppose.
35:LGagnon
1136:Anlace
1131:oppose
1075:Jmabel
1000:Jkelly
942:Jkelly
850:Jkelly
846:above)
841:Oppose
760:Done.
624:Jmabel
604:CBGB's
476:music.
366:Object
349:Jmabel
258:Jmabel
1091:that.
892:WP:FA
792:Album
788:Album
331:nixie
237:might
16:<
1079:Talk
628:Talk
602:and
578:CBGB
353:Talk
319:and
262:Talk
254:KEXP
250:KNDD
1038:MRR
1032::
998:.
329:.--
231:of
1077:|
1062:,
1059:,
626:|
351:|
327:}}
321:{{
317:}}
311:{{
260:|
252:,
244:,
1101:(
418:(
416:2
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