180:-class ships were among the casualties and one was used as a target ship to evaluate the effectiveness of her armor scheme and the other was converted into an aircraft carrier. This ship was one of those that attacked US forces at Pearl Harbor and Allied forces at Darwin, Australia before she was sunk at the Battle of Midway in 1942. This article had a
1103:"The ships' secondary armament of twenty 50-caliber 14-centimeter guns would have been mounted in casemates, 12 on the upper sides of the hull and eight in the superstructure. The 3rd Year Type guns". -Can you link 3rd Year Type in the first instance here or say 14-centimeter 3rd Year Type guns as it had be wondering what 3rd Year Type was.♦
175:
These class of battleships was one of the first
Japanese responses to an enormous buildup in the US Navy announced by President Woodrow Wilson after the end of World War I that started a naval arms race between Japan, Great Britain and the United States. The enormously expensive ships involved caused
667:
Prose-wise, copyedited so pls let me know if you disagree with anything. It's a bit difficult to write about 'might have been' things, so there's an understandable preponderance of "would have had" when describing design, etc -- the only thing I'd suggest here is perhaps varying this occasionally
419:
263:"The IJN began reevaluating the Nagato design in light of lessons learned from the Battle of Jutland ...", "Hiraga's design for the ship reflected the lessons from the Battle of Jutland ...": If possible, it would be better not to say it twice.
718:
The first sentence's statement that these ships were "built as part of the "Eight-Eight" fleet" seems inaccurate given that neither was completed (and, from memory, the eight-eight fleet was not achieved) - 'built' is the problematic word here
831:
No, you're right, it was just a holiday on capital ship construction. Everything from cruisers on down was essentially unrestricted (incidentally, limitations on cruiser building were put into effect in 1930 with the London Naval Treaty).
476:"The ships were larger versions of the preceding Nagato class, and mounted an additional 41-centimeter (16.1 in) twin-gun turret." The ships mounted turrets? Is that normal vernacular (as opposed to the turrets being mounted on the ships)?
581:
I gotta say that I don't regard "this" as ambiguous as the entire previous sentence was about the rationale for the 8-8 fleet program. Nonetheless, I've added "policy" to the second sentence to clarify things. Thanks for looking it
738:"The Diet authorized three more dreadnoughts in response the following year: Mutsu, Tosa and Kaga" - was it planned to build the 2nd and 3rd of these ships as an updated design at this time? It might also be worth noting here that
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I always like to give gun performance data in a class article. If I remove it here I'll have to remove it for all the other guns that the design would have used. I did remove the "by WW2" bit as that's unnecessarily
562:
This one might need Sturm - I don't have Evans & Peattie handy. It looks as though the "this" in question refers to the 1907 Imperial
Defense Policy. If that's correct, it would be best to state that explicitly.
236:
design, known as Design A-114, was accepted on 28 October by the Navy
Minister, but was not proceeded with.": If nothing ever came of it, what's important enough about this particular design to single it out? - Dank
1040:
Can you give some description of its physical attributes in the lead? I know the infobox has the facts, but to effectively summarize the article I feel it needs some of the basic information in prose in the lead.
1188:
is linked to twice. The second time it's via redirect. The second link should be unlinked. Redirs shouldn't be in there at all and we only need to link to something once. Consider as support once this is fixed.
1095:
Adjacent quantities that are not comparable should usually be in different formats: twelve 90-minute volumes or 12 ninety-minute volumes is more readable than 12 90-minute volumes or twelve ninety-minute
316:
808:
I'd suggest removing the para which starts with "By World War II, the guns used Type 91 armor-piercing, capped shells" as its not really all that relevant to this cancelled design
526:"took part in the attack on Pearl Harbor and the invasion of Rabaul in the Southwest Pacific in January 1942" As written, suggests both of those actions occurred in January 1942.
1044:
I never put physical characteristics in the lede as I believe that that's not summarizing, but merely duplicating info presented in fuller detail in the description section.
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501:"The design for the class also served as a basis for the Amagi-class battlecruisers." The "also" implies you have already written something about the design was doing.
402:
The three of you got together on a warship project, and the world didn't implode? I'm disappointed, I had expected this much awesomeness to have reached critical mass.
1077:
I gave the abbreviation in the lede and used it first in the background section, only two paragraphs later. The reader shouldn't have any problem following the usage.
770:
Can the specific influence of the various factors in the paragraph starting "The IJN began reevaluating the Nagato design in light of lessons learned" be identified?
1092:
Comparable quantities should be all spelled out or all figures: we may write either 5 cats and 32 dogs or five cats and thirty-two dogs, not five cats and 32 dogs.
828:
Did the
Washington Naval Treaty really mandate "the cancellation of all naval ships being built"? I thought that smaller ships were OK (I could be totally wrong).
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The sentence which begins with "Kaga was originally planned to be scrapped" is a bit over-complex - I'd suggest splitting this into a couple of sentences
1152:
This looks great; no grammar nitpicks or anything. One question though: since neither was technically scrapped, why does the infobox say "1 scrapped"?
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I know you don't. ;) It's not a dealbreaker really, but it's not ideal writing. ESL readers in particular have trouble with that construction. --
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the US to call a conference among the major powers to forestall the arms race that caused most of the ships already begun to be scrapped. The
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282:"they were raised in height": If you know how many feet or meters they were raised, that might be a better way to put it. - Dank (
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Can you write
Imperial Japanese Navy (IJN) instead of IJN in the first instance in the background section and then use IJN ?
944:
Aside from the minor issue immediately above, my comments are addressed and I'm pleased to support this article's promotion.
908:
It's an internet-only journal that requires a subscription. I've added that template, but it doesn't list a publisher.--
555:). "This was the genesis of the Eight-Eight Fleet Program" Avoid the ambiguous "this" in reference to previous subjects.
1082:
As I see you are using digits for numbers like 16 and 20, number above nine should be in digits too, ten and eleven.
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Can you add details of how readers could do that? (eg, his personal website, or his email address if it's public)
1167:
Because it's the closest to what actually happened among the available options of scrapped, preserved, or lost.--
210:. To the nominator: if you do not intend to submit this article at the WikiCup, feel free to remove this notice.
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Not especially; I just thought it was interesting that they were already considering revising the design.--
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The two Tosas were already a separate design. I think that Parsec's change clarifies things well enough.
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Can you provide a URL? At present it's not clear how readers could actually access this publication.
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I'd love to, but you have to email the editor and he'll send you the issue(s), once you've paid.--
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Can the publishing details to
Lengerer, Hans (June 2010) be fleshed out? It's unclear what
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has been promoted, but there may be a delay in bot processing of the close. Please see
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I'll let Sturm address the specifics of the authorization, but I've added the bit about
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File:41cm-45 3rd Year Type naval gun outside the Yamato Museum during
October 2008.jpg
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Image-wise, agree with Crisco that licensing looks okay except that I'd expect
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Some of the details in the infobox (for example, the successor) are unsourced
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This is a very solid article on this design. I have the following comments:
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I generally do so, but the exceptions involve the 2nd and 3rd bullets from
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Also, I keep seeing this problem in ship articles (persisting still in HMS
1116:
Good catch, done. Appreciate you're taking the time to review this nom.--
340:
Predecessor and successor classes have never been specifically sourced.
470:- The body looks pretty good, but the lead is not written very well.
353:
Be consistent in how you notate short citations with multiple authors
39:
Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in
184:
four years ago, but has been substantially overhauled recently.--
206:
nomination. The following nominators are WikiCup participants:
892:
Contributions to the
History of Imperial Japanese Warships
348:
Good catch, two different books, one of which was missing.
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Featured article candidates/Tosa-class battleship/archive1
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1209:
Good catch. Fixed, and thanks for looking this over.--
228:. I'm doing some copyediting; feel free to revert.
1270:The above discussion is preserved as an archive.
438:File:Japanese Navy Aircraft Carrier Kaga 1928.jpg
408:Addressed comments from Crisco 1492 moved to talk
379:Self-published, sort of. Thanks for the review.--
452:on prose and images, very good work everyone! —
41:Knowledge (XXG) talk:Featured article candidates
644:Thanks for reviewing the article, Laser brain.
43:. No further edits should be made to this page.
789:What position did Captain Yuzuru Hiraga hold?
671:Structure, coverage and referencing seem fine.
446:- Fine (a little grainy, but no problem there)
1276:No further edits should be made to this page.
1249:template in place on the talk page until the
678:to have a US PD tag like the others. Cheers,
29:The following is an archived discussion of a
8:
676:File:Japanese Navy Aircraft Carrier Kaga.jpg
444:File:Japanese Navy Aircraft Carrier Kaga.jpg
426:File:Model of battleship Kaga port view.jpg
18:Knowledge (XXG):Featured article candidates
440:- Very blown out, but copyright-wise fine.
124:
362:Be consistent in when you include states
127:
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692:Added. Thanks for looking this over.--
894:(Special Paper I) is - is it a book?
668:with "was/were to have" or some such.
7:
867:The last para should note the date
345:Evans and Peattie or just Peattie?
292:Rephrased. Thanks for the review.--
24:
533:Added the date for Pearl Harbor.
432:File:Japanese battleship Tosa.jpg
359:No citations to Jentschura et al
1:
742:was a follow-on from Nagato.
483:How about "and carried..."?
232:"One revised version of the
1263:05:41, 29 August 2013 (UTC)
1244:featured article candidates
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57:10:02, 31 August 2013 (UTC)
31:featured article nomination
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365:Lengerer 2010: publisher?
626:Pretty close to ready. --
462:23:30, 20 July 2013 (UTC)
397:Comments from Crisco 1492
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194:20:36, 30 June 2013 (UTC)
1273:Please do not modify it.
375:20:26, 4 July 2013 (UTC)
325:21:27, 4 July 2013 (UTC)
288:17:54, 4 July 2013 (UTC)
243:17:24, 4 July 2013 (UTC)
220:00:01, 1 July 2013 (UTC)
36:Please do not modify it.
1007:That looks good to me.
356:FN18: should use endash
1186:Attack on Pearl Harbor
851:See how it reads now.
722:Changed to "ordered".
333:- spotchecks not done
319:are my edits. - Dank (
182:MilHist A-class review
74:Tosa-class battleship
67:Tosa-class battleship
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266:Rephrased.--
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202:: This is a
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141:Citation bot
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1140:Dr. Blofeld
1107:Dr. Blofeld
1059:Dr. Blofeld
792:Expanded.--
630:Laser brain
604:Laser brain
454:Crisco 1492
1087:WP:Numeral
812:precise.--
367:Nikkimaria
1237:WP:FAC/ar
1233:candidate
876:Parsecboy
871:was sunk
853:Parsecboy
834:Parsecboy
751:Parsecboy
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646:Parsecboy
565:Parsecboy
535:Parsecboy
510:Parsecboy
508:Removed.
485:Parsecboy
212:UcuchaBot
164:Parsecboy
1231:: This
1096:volumes.
711:Comments
680:Ian Rose
468:Comments
226:Comments
168:The ed17
136:Analysis
50:promoted
1192:Pumpkin
1154:Maralia
1150:Support
1134:Support
993:Done.--
942:Support
874:Added.
662:Support
582:over.--
553:Warrior
450:Support
434:- Fine.
428:- Fine.
422:- Fine.
309:Support
204:WikiCup
128:Toolbox
91:protect
86:history
1255:Ucucha
1009:Nick-D
981:Nick-D
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