55:
I went through and did a copyedit to check for minor writing errors. I fixed everything I could find. As far as the article as a whole goes, I think it's looking great. It's got a lot of great information and seems to be well-sourced. If I had to pick on one minor thing, I don't like the use of the
101:
The thing about the
Mercedes. I dunno, I don't really believe it. Mercs were around a long time before Joey's uncle and President Marcos, surely. There was always a wealthy upper class in the Philippines; a few of them must have had Mercs back in the day. Perhaps the anecdote refers to a new
339:
Interested to see that Deal is reluctant. Maybe it's not a bad thing to keep the four original cds as the only ones. (Frank doesn't have much idea of quality control and his throw-it-at-the-wall-and-see-what-the-splash-looks-like approach probably wouldn't do the Pixies any favours.)
86:
I really enjoyed the article. Even though I'm a big Pixies fan, I don't know much about Joey. I sense that this article is hard put to really say something substantial about him, though, because he obviously keeps himself to himself and doesn't inspire much
312:*Anything about the present status of the Pixies? On the Colin Murray show, Frank was saying that it looks like they are splitting up again. He said the others hadn't forgiven him for splitting them up last time and that was the reason for the coming split.
224:
Does this come under that Ganz ref? If so, it could perhaps do with an "according to Ganz" hedge there. I don't agree with it, to be honest. Each member of the group remained crucial to the sound, to my ears (blasting Trompe through the lugs at the
178:
Joey's quote comes over like the same incident as when he rushed home to get his guitar and they started playing together. Maybe the two mentions can be amalgamated a bit.
568:
the "a lot poppier and quirker" (should be "quirkier") quote is on that same website under the interview section :). The word "demoed" is still being used, and shouldn't
142:. Any idea how old he was? The article jumps to this from when he was eight. No pre-teen would play the Velvs, I reckon. Some words of transition are needed, possibly.
94:
It was an interesting article to write; there doesn't seem to be much about the guy when I first looked, but after digging deeper, there's some interesting facts.
594:"Early demo versions of this new song were recorded in Santiago's basement." - one of the words is probably redundant though - maybe "versions" can be removed
494:
Their recorded output by the end of the 1990s comprised a single self-recorded song in 1995, "Free", that appeared on the film soundtrack of Empire
Records.
365:
Anyway, good stuff. Gave me an excuse to play them through my lugholes again, quantifying the prominence of Joey and realising again how good he is.--
176:
I did notice right away that he was playing music. I didn't want any more distractions, but I took my guitar up and we started fooling around with it.
206:*The article jumps abruptly from 1985 to 1987. Could some transitional information be added about these formative years? What was the band doing?
21:
114:
I just flat can't believe these were the first three Mercs, at such a late stage in their manufacture. Also there's more than one island.
149:
I've just noticed this in the source: "About a year later,". So apparently pre-teens (Santiago was nine) do play the Velvs. Clarified.
349:
Yeah, I think it's a good thing overall; another single or two would hardly harm the legacy. However, it's just not going to happen.
37:
I'm looking to take this to featured status soon. Any comments on comprehensiveness, arrangement or quality of prose welcome.
158:
Santiago met his future wife, Linda
Mallari, when he sat beside her after a 1987 tour with the Pixies at The Rathskeller.
65:
Thanks for the copyedit. I've rephrased the sentence that contained the word "demoed"; I'm not a fan of the term either.
213:
The answer is "not much". Mostly practicing and touring around Boston; I've added this to the article to clarify things.
222:
Santiago's lead guitar became less prominent in the band's later releases, 1990's
Bossanova and 1991's Trompe le Monde.
185:
I've shortened the second quote, but otherwise left it as is. The second quote is in a different context to the first.
167:
To clarify, it was a concert at The
Rathskeller that they first met. (I don't know why "tour" was there instead.)
160:
Couldn't work this out. Straight after? During? What is the connection between the tour and meeting the missis?
17:
270:*"Their output". Recorded output? (It says later that they had "previous material" before they did Smitten.)
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Thanks for the review (you've asked good questions). I'll try to address these throughout the week.
243:*Florida is mentioned out of the blue, without the reader being told he had moved there or whatever.
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I've rephrased the sentence in question; it's true that
Santiago adopted a surf guitar style in
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Removed. It's just too contentious, and I haven't found another source that really backs it up.
109:
Clarified. On further research, I don't think it was for a new model. I'll keep looking however.
465:- isn't "and was soon playing "non-blues-scale, non-cover-song rock" with Thompson." better?
496:- needs rephrasing; I needed to read that sentence twice before i understood what it meant.
431:- should probably mention that you're talking about cars; right now its rather ambiguous.
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I've not got information on when he moved to
Florida (apparently he moved to LA before
124:
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298:*When did he do the Billboard interview? That needs to go in the text, in my opinion.
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570:"He also contributed to albums by Charles Douglas and Pixies band-mate Frank Black"
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Will do. I think I'll go through the member articles etc. and update the info soon.
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He also contributed to albums by
Charles Douglas and Pixies bandmate Frank Black.
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The first song he learned to play was the Velvet
Underground's "Rock and Roll"
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and he and
Thompson were soon playing "non-blues-scale, non-cover-song rock.
479:
link 1970s punk - preferably to the 1970s section in the punk rock article.
581:
Ok, thanks! I did rephrase the sentence to remove the word "demoed", but
585:
added it back in. Could you perhaps suggest a replacement for the term?
400:- shouldn't that be "former Pixies band mate"? Band mate is two words.
414:
The 2nd paragraph has the word "technique" thrice in two sentences.
527:
American English niggles - "demeanour", "travelled", "rumours".
393:
This is definitely approaching FA status. A few minor quibbles:
56:
word "demoed". It sounds too colloquial for an encyclopedia.
192:*"managing wood". I'm not familiar with the expression.
603:
Rephrased. Thanks for the inspiration and the review.
429:
when the first three Mercedes arrived on the island
291:
Only occasionally. Updated article to reflect this.
254:(I'll add that in when I get the chance) though).
513:- include "quiet" or "sober" to make it clearer.
326:Updated. Let me know if more detail is required.
284:*Did the Martinis gig? The article doesn't say.
572:mention that Black was his former band-mate?
8:
261:Nope, can't find when he moved to Florida.
199:Simplified. Didn't make much sense anyway.
544:- I can't find the quote on that webpage.
421:Changed. Thanks for pointing that out.
7:
448:- I think "he" is redundant there.
28:
446:but he eventually chose economics
305:Done. In March 2006, apparently.
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608:23:59, 7 November 2007 (UTC)
599:16:09, 6 November 2007 (UTC)
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577:05:16, 6 November 2007 (UTC)
561:09:35, 5 November 2007 (UTC)
380:13:24, 1 November 2007 (UTC)
370:01:48, 1 November 2007 (UTC)
354:22:06, 8 November 2007 (UTC)
345:17:26, 8 November 2007 (UTC)
236:, and it's worth mentioning.
128:22:06, 8 November 2007 (UTC)
119:17:26, 8 November 2007 (UTC)
70:23:13, 31 October 2007 (UTC)
61:22:26, 31 October 2007 (UTC)
42:12:35, 25 October 2007 (UTC)
542:"a lot poppier and quirker"
503:Hopefully it's clearer now.
18:Knowledge (XXG):Peer review
630:
511:his general demeanour
407:Hyphenated. Fixed.
277:Clarified, thanks.
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386:Review by
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47:Review by
605:CloudNine
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351:CloudNine
252:Bossanova
234:Bossanova
125:CloudNine
67:CloudNine
39:CloudNine
225:moment).
20: |
583:qp10qp
534:Fixed.
520:Added.
367:qp10qp
342:qp10qp
116:qp10qp
102:model.
80:Qp10qp
551:Done.
486:Done.
472:Done.
455:Done.
87:copy.
16:<
220:*
174:*
156:*
138:*
Text is available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License. Additional terms may apply.