Knowledge (XXG)

:Peer review/Shannen Says/archive2 - Knowledge (XXG)

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1780:"The second episode aired on Tuesday night in the same time slot, and two episodes were aired every Sunday night in the same time slot until the end of the season" - I would clarify that the first episode also aired on a Tuesday and that the second episode was a week later, and maybe also mention the gap between eps 2 and 3 (i.e. the first Sunday night episode wasn't on the Sunday immediately after ep 2) 161: 874:
Removed. It was only used twice in the article. One instance was already supported by another citation and the other instance was it calling the show a "docu-series" which is likely not important. I think I added that part because there was a time when people were using that term a lot (like with the
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Thank you for the edit. That was completely my fault as I should have read your suggestion more carefully. It was not confusing and I take responsibility for that. I will likely keep this peer review open for a while longer to get as much feedback as possible, but I will definitely let you know when
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I do understand your point, and I would not mind changing it in the future. I originally put this wording in to emphasize that this was a smaller part of a larger article to avoid any potential confusion or misinterpretation. I have also used "In X publication," elsewhere in the section so I thought
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Unfortunately, nothing else is available for the others from reliable sources. This was a smaller show on a smaller network and according to reports, it fared poorly in terms of ratings so it probably just never registered on charts or was seen as notable enough to expand space in write-ups about
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Thank you for looking through the images. I have italicized the parenthetical information in successful FACs without an issue. I do it to distinguish the information from the rest of the caption, but I can understand what other editors prefer to not go this route. I do not think there is a policy
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Shannen Says had low ratings, ranking below most other programs on its broadcast night – You could probably rewrite to "Shannen Says suffered from low viewership and ranked below most other programs when it debuted/premiered, despite its popularity among women between the ages of 25 and 54." Hope
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I added a more specific timeframe to the lead, but I am not sure what else I can add for critical consensus. I have a sentence about the series and Doherty herself were the subject of mixed reviews, but I do not think there is a clear enough theme to comfortable put into the lead. There was some
428:"since she had previously been married to actor Ashley Hamilton and poker player Rick Salomon that ended in 1994 and 2003, respectively" could just be "since her previous marriages to actor Ashley Hamilton and poker player Rick Salomon ended in 1994 and 2003, respectively" 835:
Thank you for the kind words and for all your help with this review. I always find it super weird to revisit older articles I worked on. I may have only worked on this one six years ago, but it feels like a lifetime ago since I was in such a different space at the time.
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due to a lack of activity. I would like to try and put this article through the FAC process again, but I would like to make sure to get as much feed back as possible prior to doing that. Any suggestion for improvement would be greatly appreciated. Thank you in advance!
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I'm a little unsure about the summary sentence for the last paragraph in Critical reception, since there are just two reviews and the second one seems to be saying that Doherty "did not 'sob for an hour'" like Spelling? Maybe I will get it if you clarify this,
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I used the original wording to really emphasize that the network was unknown, but I agree that your wording is better. The current wording is awkward and the emphasis is unneeded as your wording covers that much more naturally.
1777:"about her relationship with husband Dean McDermott and Keeping Up with the Kardashians." - can you re-phrase this so that it doesn't read like she had a relationship with both her husband and Keeping Up with the Kardashians? 701:, in the article and that kind of throw-away line is probably not notable enough. I moved the MTV News bit up to the second paragraph because it is a commentary on Doherty's personality so I think it should fit there. 361:, but I do not think that is notable enough to mention in the lead (but it is interesting to me that Doherty was inspired by shows that are outside of the typical celebrity life reality show genre). 191: 1321:, especially when better references are available, but were the photos exclusively published through that? If so, then I'd say making an exception by keeping it in place here would be reasonable. 1350:
Having a two-sentence paragraph under "Filming and cast" looks rather short, which makes the flow of text feel choppy. Either expand that or merge it with another one.
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Thank you for all of your suggestions. You have helped to improve the article a lot and remove some of the sillier mistakes. Have a great rest of your weekend!
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mixed opinions about the drama presented on the show and if Doherty came across as likable, but I was uncertain of generalizing too much if that makes sense.
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Shannen Says tracks the events leading up – I think the better word is documented (as my understanding is this is sort of a reality/documentary type of show)
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I do not think it is necessary since the citation is in the next sentence so it would cover both of these sentences, but I have still copied it regardless.
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Thank you for all the help. I believe that I have addressed everything, but let me know if there is anything that I can do to further improve the article.
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Someone once told me this at one of my first FACs but I have never been able to locate any MOS that mandates this. So should be fine either way, really.--
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There seems to be inconsistency in whether commas are used after a date mid-sentence, e.g. "April 10, 2012 in the United States", "April 10, 2012, as
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Thank you for the review. Your comments were very helpful. I believe that I have addressed everything and I hope you have a great rest of your week!
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so it is not explicitly clear which one she saw. A majority of the coverage was comparing Doherty and Spelling because they both worked together on
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Except for maybe episode ratings, I believe this has all the details needed to qualify as comprehensive enough in coverage to meet FA standards.
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with the Associated Press. Unfortunately, I have been having trouble with archiving the new citation, but I will try to do it at a later date.
1768:"Shannen Says was initially going to be developed by Doherty's production company, No Apologies Production" - last word was plural in the lead 1200: 126: 326: 214:
I will place my placeholder here. TV shows are not really my area of expertise but I will try my best to be helpful in any way possible!--
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I have added a comma for California. I do not think there is another instance of this, but I may be over-looking another one (or more).
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My review is more focused on prose and I didn't look at the references. The article is in great shape in my opinion. Great work here!--
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Do you think changing "unidentified television network" to "another television network" would be detrimental to conveying its meaning?
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The tone of "suffered" from "suffered from low viewership" doesn't sound appropriate. You'd be better off with "had low viewership".
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A general question about the captions: are you sure the parantheticals should be italicized? In either case, more to follow later.
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Since the "We" in "We TV" is not an acronym, should the stylization be used here? I have the same doubt about "RelativelyREAL".
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is in fact the uploader's own work, maybe you could get something where Kim's hair doesn't blend into the background so much.
403:"Shannen Says and Doherty received mixed reviews" might have more of a ring than the way this sentence is currently written. 1403:
Thank you for the clarification. I must have combined these two paragraphs earlier for the reason you have provided above.
557:"All of the episodes have been made available from Amazon Video" - Would another word be more appropriate than "from" here? 99: 1146: 50: 62: 1357:
Could you clarify this point for me? I am not seeing the two-sentence paragraph in the section mentioned above?
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Thank you for the review. I believe that I have addressed everything. I hope you are having a good week so far!
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citation as the other citation coupled with it already supported the information in the article. I replaced
1080:, sorry my comment on item 2 was confusing. Looks good otherwise, give me a ping when you take it to FAC. -- 1020:
It focuses on the preparations – Think you should refer to it as "the show" or "the series" on this instance
1791: 1783:"Doherty described Shannen Says as a one-off created" - created isn't a noun, so maybe you mean creation? 1450:
Only the second episode has a viewership count listed. Is it because nothing is available for the others?
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Thank you for the review. I believe that I have addressed everything. I hope you have a great weekend!
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I meant the third paragraph, which began with "To prepare for filming" and is now part of the second.
186:'s wedding to photographer Kurt Iswarienko. I created this article back in July 2016. I put it up for 1261:
It would help to add a timeframe for filming to the lead along with what reviewers liked/didn't like.
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did exclusively publish these photos so that's why I think it would be appropriate in this context.
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She had her own reality show (“Shannen Says” in 2012) and she didn’t sob for an hour, Tori Spelling.
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Good point. I believe that I have addressed all the dates, but let me know if I missed anything.
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You can probably unlink "guest-starred" per WP:OVERLINK when that's a commonly recognized term.
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I'm pretty sure the last two paragraphs under "Broadcast history and release" could be merged.
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Overall, the article appears to be in good shape. Great work. I hope my comments are helpful.
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Thank you for your review. If it is alright with you, I will address your comments tomorrow.
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Thank you, Aoba. The article looks great. See you at the FAC! You have a great week too.--
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I would cut down on the use of however. It tends to be unpopular among FAC reviewers.
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I have gone with Realscreen.com so I have changed it in the citation to match this.
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I usually use a comma after names of places mid-sentence, e.g. "Malibu, California,"
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and a contestant on the tenth season – think this needs to be "as a contestant"
899:"Sneak peek" is too informal. I would call it a preview or something similar. 1506: 1713:
Nothing else comes to mind at the moment, and it was my pleasure :).
1774:"and RelativityReal." - in the lead you wrote the Real part in caps 1483:
Fair point. I have combined them as they do cover a similar topic.
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There should be a reference directly after the quote from Berkshire
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for instance) and in the interview, Doherty only says that she say
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Very well-written otherwise. Let me know once you take it to FAC.
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it would be a nice change of pace to vary the sentence structure.
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That is much better and I have used that wording in the article.
324:. Spelling and McDermott have done a few reality shows together ( 1771:"The series was produced by No Apologies Production" - and again 582:
Could "as part of" just be "in" in "As part of an article for
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The ref says "Realscreen" but the prose says "Realscrean.com"
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are subpar publications and I'd look for something stronger.
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Are the names of the shows she watched in preparation known?
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reality show that documented the preparations for actress
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What makes Realscrean.com a high-quality reliable source?
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Oddly enough, Doherty says that the show was inspired by
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and I tried to make that connection clear in the prose.
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was definitely a good replacement for Ms. Kardashian.
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Good point. I have removed the stylizations for both.
435:Thank you for the suggestion, and I have used it. 1145:While I don't see any good reason to doubt that 1538:when "The" is part of this publication's title. 1141:File:Tori Spelling at The Heart Truth 2009.jpg 1243:Understandable. I have used your suggestion. 70: 8: 1125:I'll kick this off by assessing the images: 77: 63: 32: 178:Hello everyone. This article is about a 35: 1328:I completely understand your concern. 698: 697:review. It was all from one sentence, 1201:File:Kim Kardashian portrait 2009.jpg 379:Agree with you on both points here.-- 327:Tori & Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood 7: 1317:Normally I wouldn't recommend using 333:Tori & Dean: sTORIbook Weddings 1099:the FAC is open. Thank you again! 24: 352:Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations 159: 313:Keeping Up with the Kardashians 1: 1181:about this. Thank you again. 1147:File:Kim Kardashian 2009.jpg 235:Thank you! I appreciate it. 612:That makes perfect sense.-- 18:Knowledge (XXG):Peer review 1854: 1763:Comments from ChrisTheDude 1741:It is always appreciated. 316:and one of the shows with 1786:That's what I got :-) -- 881:reality television show. 1821:16:13, 5 June 2022 (UTC) 1796:10:48, 5 June 2022 (UTC) 1751:16:26, 7 June 2022 (UTC) 1733:03:16, 7 June 2022 (UTC) 1705:01:17, 7 June 2022 (UTC) 1681:14:53, 5 June 2022 (UTC) 1654:01:17, 7 June 2022 (UTC) 1617:01:05, 7 June 2022 (UTC) 1583:01:05, 7 June 2022 (UTC) 1555:01:05, 7 June 2022 (UTC) 1526:01:05, 7 June 2022 (UTC) 1493:01:05, 7 June 2022 (UTC) 1468:01:05, 7 June 2022 (UTC) 1442:01:05, 7 June 2022 (UTC) 1413:16:26, 7 June 2022 (UTC) 1395:03:16, 7 June 2022 (UTC) 1367:01:05, 7 June 2022 (UTC) 1342:01:05, 7 June 2022 (UTC) 1307:03:16, 7 June 2022 (UTC) 1279:01:05, 7 June 2022 (UTC) 1253:01:05, 7 June 2022 (UTC) 1223:23:53, 2 June 2022 (UTC) 1191:23:52, 2 June 2022 (UTC) 1173:23:28, 2 June 2022 (UTC) 1137:File:Shannen Doherty.jpg 1109:16:24, 1 June 2022 (UTC) 1090:15:33, 1 June 2022 (UTC) 1068:15:29, 1 June 2022 (UTC) 1044:14:17, 31 May 2022 (UTC) 1007:02:40, 28 May 2022 (UTC) 983:20:34, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 966:02:40, 28 May 2022 (UTC) 941:02:40, 28 May 2022 (UTC) 916:02:40, 28 May 2022 (UTC) 891:02:40, 28 May 2022 (UTC) 846:16:26, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 827:08:00, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 805:01:43, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 780:02:29, 26 May 2022 (UTC) 757:18:01, 25 May 2022 (UTC) 733:08:00, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 711:01:39, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 693:I ended up removing the 675:08:00, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 653:01:34, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 626:08:00, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 604:01:34, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 574:01:34, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 549:01:34, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 518:08:00, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 496:01:34, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 471:01:25, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 445:01:25, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 420:01:25, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 393:08:00, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 371:01:25, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 295:01:25, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 270:01:25, 27 May 2022 (UTC) 245:01:06, 25 May 2022 (UTC) 228:14:56, 24 May 2022 (UTC) 205:22:51, 23 May 2022 (UTC) 1563:Don't use italics for 1432:Good point. Unlinked. 1132:has an appropriate FUR 1121:Comments from SNUGGUMS 530:Shannen Says, Season 1 1838:May 2022 peer reviews 188:a peer review in 2018 171:discussion is closed. 1534:Use a capital T for 1458:television ratings. 1130:File:ShannenSays.jpg 1015:Comments by Pseud 14 343:Beverly Hills, 90210 150:Previous peer review 1598:New York Daily News 1502:The Huffington Post 1232:Now for the prose: 584:The Washington Post 1642:The Christian Post 1627:The Christian Post 1287:That sounds fair. 1024:that reads better. 862:Comments by FrB.TG 504:Looks great now.-- 1199:My pleasure, and 564:Revised to "on". 176: 175: 142:Watch peer review 87: 86: 1845: 1810: 1694: 1536:The Futon Critic 1057: 996: 794: 769: 163: 162: 156: 139: 130: 111: 79: 72: 65: 47: 33: 1853: 1852: 1848: 1847: 1846: 1844: 1843: 1842: 1828: 1827: 1804: 1765: 1688: 1625:"SheKnows" and 1135:No qualms with 1123: 1051: 1017: 990: 864: 788: 763: 358:Deadliest Catch 338:Tori & Dean 212: 192:the FAC in 2020 184:Shannen Doherty 160: 145: 120: 97: 91: 83: 51:Manual of Style 43: 31: 22: 21: 20: 12: 11: 5: 1851: 1849: 1841: 1840: 1830: 1829: 1826: 1825: 1824: 1823: 1799: 1798: 1784: 1781: 1778: 1775: 1772: 1769: 1764: 1761: 1760: 1759: 1758: 1757: 1756: 1755: 1754: 1753: 1736: 1735: 1708: 1707: 1659: 1658: 1657: 1656: 1636:I removed the 1631: 1630: 1622: 1621: 1620: 1619: 1602: 1601: 1595:. 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Index

Knowledge (XXG):Peer review
Shannen Says
Copying check
Manual of Style
v
t
e
Article
edit
visual edit
history
Article talk
edit
history
Watch
Watch peer review
Previous peer review
peer review
WE tv
Shannen Doherty
a peer review in 2018
the FAC in 2020
Aoba47
talk
22:51, 23 May 2022 (UTC)
N
Ø
14:56, 24 May 2022 (UTC)
Aoba47
talk

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