746:(76 mm)" Understood that there's a problem here, because we're not inserting conversions inside links, and someone may ask for the conversion anyway. Still, I think this probably isn't the best solution; some readers, not knowing what "20 cwt" is (I know there's a link but most people don't click), will think that the 76 mm is a conversion for 20 cwt.
622:
It seems a bit simplistic to say that "The disarmament provisions of the
Washington Naval Treaty required the destruction of New Zealand as part of Britain's tonnage limit, and she was sold for scrap in 1922." given that the RN considered her obsolete and had no use for ships armed with 12-inch guns
460:
A1) Citations. I'd prefer the first paragraph to have a ref in the middle of it ("As a result, the
Indefatigable class was not a significant improvement on the Invincible design; the ships were smaller and not as well protected as the contemporary German battlecruiser SMS Von der Tann and subsequent
671:
I can't even confirm that her 4-inch guns are still on display outside the
Auckland War Memorial Museum. I know that most of those guns were used after she was scrapped for coastal defence, and I even know where, but the source isn't RS. If you've know of anything that meets RS criteria let me know
647:
move into reserve or undertake a major refit at this time? The normal terminology is that whoever the commander of the squadron was shifted their command (or 'flag') to the other ship. The same applies to "relieving HMS Indefatigable as flagship" and "On 9 June, Australia returned from the dockyard
295:
Perhaps a bit more analysis as to why the
British RN changed their position in terms of dominion defence being centralized would be in order. I recognize that it's fairly tangential, but even just a quick blurb as to why the decision was made (my personal guess is it had to do with the German Navy
350:
Beatty ordered
Indomitable to attack her, but the combination of a signalling error by Beatty's flag lieutenant and heavy damage to Beatty's flagship Lion, which had knocked out her radio and caused enough smoke to obscure her signal halyards, caused the rest of the British battlecruisers,
482:
have a point-of-view issue. If you've got the book in front of you, could you just appraise it for this? If you can, perhaps another citation for things like "The setting sun blinded the German gunners" since that could be construed as an 'excuse' (if you see what I mean).
651:
I've seen it done both ways. Ship oriented books tend to talk about the ship becoming flagships while more general histories tend to refer to admirals shifting their flags. Australia might have become the new flagship when Gordon Moore left the squadron, but I can't be
477:
A2) Coverage. Seems to be really good, I can't think of any questions I'm really left with. As far as I can see, no unnecessary detail or bias. However, I have a small concern: "Jutland: The German
Perspective: A New View of the Great Battle" sounds like it
635:"When the tour concluded, New Zealand was originally to remain in the Pacific region, the Admiralty requested that she instead return to the United Kingdom." - reads a bit awkwardly and should probably be split into two sentences.
196:
When she was back in
British waters, did she operate as part of a NZ Squadron (in a fashion similar to RCAF Squadrons operating under RAF Bomber Command) or was she the sole NZ ship stationed in the British isles?
717:"was attributed": it's not weaselly at all to say that something was thought about a ship if the thought clearly comes from the relevant part of the chain of command, but that's not the case here.
787:
Something's missing here: 'When the tour concluded, New
Zealand was originally to remain in the Pacific region, the Admiralty requested that she instead return to the United Kingdom." - Dank (
200:
The RNZN had not yet been formed during WWI so she certainly wasn't assigned to a NZ Squadron because such did not exist. She was, for the duration of her existence, a ship of the Royal Navy.
240:
I can source that the fighters were for anti-Zeppelin duties, but I'm not sure about the two seaters. I'll have to dig around for their intended functions. Thanks for the prompt review.--
703:
134:- "The Dominions" is a pretty general term (it covered 20% of the world's populace at the time); if the number is <5, could it be specified which dominions the vessel visited?
21:
371:
New
Zealand was engaged by the battleship Prinzregent Luitpold from 5:08 p.m., during the 'Run to the North', but she was not hit, although she was straddled several times.
118:
I shouldn't have done that since they were all linked. All of those conversions have been removed; readers can click on the link if they want to know metric equivalents.
461:
German designs." is opinion-ish statement, for example) perhaps split the ref page-by-page. However, as I'm sure someone would point out, it's not a requirement.
823:
Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page, such as the current discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
115:
You convert the width of the torpedo tubes, but not of any of the other guns in the infobox. My gut says that both metric and imperial should be in there.
17:
469:
Is "Greenwich" the London/UK one (Conway
Publishing)? If so, might be best to say so, given that Greenwich is not the best known of places here.
545:- You note that the ship was hit once during the Run to the South, but there are no details. Campbell, p. 48 gives the information on the hit.
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486:
You're right to be concerned, but Tarrant correlates pretty well with British sources on things like light conditions and visibility.
237:
I presume the purpose of the aircraft was to act as recon and fire spotters, but this should probably be mentioned in the prose.
510:
132:
During 1913, New Zealand was sent on a ten-month tour of the Dominions, with an emphasis on the visit to her namesake nation.
643:"New Zealand was relieved by HMAS Australia as flagship of the 2nd BCS on 22 February 1915" - this is a bit confusing - did
39:
Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
351:
temporarily under the command of Rear-Admiral Sir Gordon Moore in New Zealand, to think that that signal applied to them.
339:
She was being overhauled by New Zealand when Beatty received messages that Scarborough was being shelled at 9:00 a.m.
296:
becoming more powerful and thus the RN needing more ships in Scapa to counter them. Am I somewhere near the mark?)
232:
Unknown, but probably because of cost. The Lion class was the real response to the Von der Tann/Moltke-class BCs.
137:
I'm going to have to check into more detailed sources. I do know that she visited South Africa among the others.
105:- it's been a while since I did one of these, but I need a break from researching the Avro Lancaster for work.
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This is a very solid article which I think meets the A class criteria. I do have some suggestions though:
63:
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181:
165:
I don't know where it was headquartered during this time. Singapore was pretty undeveloped at this time.
587:
574:
Ah yes, I looked for that but must have skimmed over it. That was my only real issue, so moving to
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More since it popped up on my watchlist and I'm feeling guitly about not finishing this earlier.
255:
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141:
88:
73:
53:
87:
I am nominating this article for A-Class review because I believe that it meets the criteria.--
754:
If this is headed to FAC, you'll want to fix the single quotes (although 'A', etc., is fine).
743:
662:
177:
341:. It isn't very clear what you mean by "overhauled". Could another word possibly be used?
229:
started, were modifications made to the design of these two battlecruisers? If not, why?
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761:
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720:
I'm not sure what your argument is here. The crew attributed the luck to the piupiu.
560:
Good catch, I'd overlooked that. Page 76 gives the really detailed info on the hit.--
159:
49:
330:
a British or German cruiser? The way it's worded right now, it's not exactly clear.
464:
The cite at the end covers the entire paragraph. That's my language, Roberts' idea.
428:
Other than that. Excellent article. Will be happy to support when these are fixed.
378:
I'd missed this on my last pass, but I've reworded it. See how it works for you.--
370:
349:
338:
131:
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373:- maybe change the last part to "she was straddled several times, but not hit".
491:
A3) I think the lead is brief, but satisfactory. Layout/headings are all fine.
657:
Can anything be said about the display of parts of the ship in New Zealand?
723:
Yes, but you don't say it was the crew, you say "was attributed". - Dank (
353:- this is a very long and convoluted sentence. Can it be shortened?
623:
even if the treaty hadn't existed (see the discussion of this at
162:" was based? (My money's on Singapore or Hong Kong. Am I right?)
333:
Added prefixes to the German cruisers. Is that clear enough?
299:
Probably, but that's getting way afield from a ship article.
760:'Fleet Units', for instance. I fixed 'lucky ship'. - Dank (
123:
Could the range figure in the infobox have a citation?
578:. It should probably mention that the hit came from
356:
I'm not seeing a way, but how would you rephrase it?
702:. As always, feel free to revert my copyediting.
308:In Service: Heligoland, Scarbourough, Dogger Bank
140:I've rewritten it to just mention South Africa.--
625:HMAS Australia (1911)#Decommissioning and fate
313:Which ships were in the 1st and 2nd BCS when
8:
18:Knowledge (XXG):WikiProject Military history
700:HMS_New_Zealand_(1911)#Raid on Scarborough
456:for the following criteria, as commented:
405:Maybe explain what a "Harwich Force" was.
648:and relieved New Zealand as flagship."
442:- All my issues have been addressed.
7:
33:The following discussion is closed.
757:In general, what do you refer to?
28:
817:The discussion above is closed.
276:That's all for now. More later.
1:
214:Given that they had obtained
158:could it be mentioned where "
698:, down to where I stopped,
58:15:14, 15 August 2011 (UTC)
840:
807:18:01, 8 August 2011 (UTC)
793:15:41, 6 August 2011 (UTC)
777:19:49, 8 August 2011 (UTC)
729:18:12, 8 August 2011 (UTC)
712:15:41, 6 August 2011 (UTC)
682:18:01, 8 August 2011 (UTC)
667:00:56, 6 August 2011 (UTC)
606:00:34, 6 August 2011 (UTC)
592:23:23, 5 August 2011 (UTC)
570:23:19, 5 August 2011 (UTC)
555:20:02, 5 August 2011 (UTC)
533:23:19, 5 August 2011 (UTC)
516:19:03, 5 August 2011 (UTC)
447:06:17, 8 August 2011 (UTC)
433:17:47, 5 August 2011 (UTC)
418:23:19, 5 August 2011 (UTC)
388:00:34, 6 August 2011 (UTC)
150:16:51, 5 August 2011 (UTC)
281:20:03, 11 July 2011 (UTC)
264:04:58, 16 July 2011 (UTC)
250:01:11, 12 July 2011 (UTC)
186:17:51, 16 July 2011 (UTC)
97:19:15, 11 July 2011 (UTC)
820:Please do not modify it.
523:Thanks for the review.--
36:Please do not modify it.
126:Added in the main body.
706:are my edits. - Dank (
64:HMS New Zealand (1911)
176:China station linked
733:Fair enough, fixed.
696:standard disclaimer
694:of it on prose per
321:Why does it matter?
672:and I'll add it.--
596:Good idea, done.--
221:design specs when
767:Fixed that one.--
82:
831:
822:
797:Indeed. Fixed.--
744:QF 3 inch 20 cwt
692:Support for half
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472:Good idea, done.
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789:push to talk
762:push to talk
725:push to talk
708:push to talk
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580:Von der Tann
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216:Von Der Tann
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645:New Zealand
315:New Zealand
290:Acquisition
227:New Zealand
178:Jim Sweeney
22:Assessment
584:Parsecboy
547:Parsecboy
497:Grandiose
223:Australia
582:though.
511:contribs
317:joined?
254:Added.--
103:Comments
50:Ian Rose
20: |
617:Support
576:support
542:Comment
454:Support
440:Support
408:Done.--
365:Jutland
328:Ariadne
659:Nick-D
209:Design
749:Done.
704:These
652:sure.
638:Done.
630:Done.
480:might
225:and
16:<
803:talk
773:talk
678:talk
663:talk
602:talk
588:talk
566:talk
551:talk
529:talk
507:talk
414:talk
384:talk
326:Was
260:talk
246:talk
182:talk
146:talk
93:talk
78:talk
54:talk
444:Cam
430:Cam
278:Cam
48:--
805:)
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509:,
505:,
503:me
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219:'s
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