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709:"His appeal to the Indonesian Supreme Court to have the sentence reduced suffered a shock when the Supreme Court imposed the death penalty on 6 September 2006" this sentence and many throughout have a poor tone to them, rendering this article almost unencyclopedic. Tone-wise, it pretty much needs a rewrite.
718:"The delivery was aborted when heroin suppliers failed to deliver "due to a financial matter or someone knowing about the plan the shipment was cancelled"." Somewhat of a run-on; the quote would be better off ending at plan.
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While this isn't an exhaustive list of issues, it's enough to tell me that the article should be failed outright. Once everything I noted is addressed, it would be best to put the article up for peer review first.
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There are parts where the articles talks a lot more about the Bali Nine itself than the person. It's not too bad, but be careful about not going into too much of a tangent.
715:"claim that Norman was involved in an attempt in December 2004, at trafficking from Indonesia to Australia." Confusing as worded, not entirely sure what it's trying to say.
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The first sentence reads like something out of a sensationalist newspaper. Perhaps just say that he "is an
Australian (occupation, which wasn't clear) who was imprisoned.."
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Unlike many of the other people, I'm seeing pretty much no personal info, which is concerning. I would have to think there's at least a little bit out there.
142:) policy, even if it is not a biography, because it contains material about living persons. Contentious material about living persons that is unsourced or
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When you have finished reviewing my changes, you may follow the instructions on the template below to fix any issues with the URLs.
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at the time. There may be suggestions below for improving the article. Once these issues have been addressed, the article can be
721:"Of the nine arrested, Norman was the youngest." this could be combined into the sentence a couple paragraphs up noting he's 18.
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to delete these "External links modified" talk page sections if they want to de-clutter talk pages, but see the
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If you have discovered URLs which were erroneously considered dead by the bot, you can report them with
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153:. If such material is repeatedly inserted, or if you have other concerns, please report the issue to
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https://web.archive.org/web/20110617132602/http://www.usp.com.au/fpss/case-bali9-mathew_norman.html
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before doing mass systematic removals. This message is updated dynamically through the template
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Many of the issues brought up in the two reviewed before this seem to apply here as well.
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The citation needed has to be addressed, especially what it is.
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from the article and its talk page, especially if potentially
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for additional information. I made the following changes:
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I see many issues throughout the article. Here are some:
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http://www.usp.com.au/fpss/case-bali9-mathew_norman.html
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Knowledge (XXG) requested images of people of
Australia
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There are a few deadlinks in the article to fix: see
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