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3. Friedrich Carl served with the fleet from her commissioning in
December 1903. Did you forget to mention which fleet in the opening line? Or is that deliberate as you go on to say which one later.
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I've put the article on hold for seven days to allow you to address the issues I've brought up. Feel free to contact me on my talk page, or here with any concerns.
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1. Fitting-out work followed and was completed by 12 December 1903. Suggest - Fitting-out work followed and this was completed by 12 December 1903
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I like to be somewhat less specific in the intro - I find it can get bogged down if you try to put too much detail.
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2. which developed a total of 17,272 indicated horsepower. Maybe change developed to produced?
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