435:
417:
483:
333:
312:
240:
222:
250:
968:
585:
544:
343:
191:
692:): I've also tagged it as needing a copyedit and being based only on primary sources (videos of political activists talking on YouTube seems like the epitome of unreliable sources). There's a whole lot of assertions in here that require some actual evidential backing. This sentence to pull out a random example:
1007:
since 2016, and it had excessive and often poor quality sources. I've removed a considerable number of the sources and replaced some of the opinion pieces and YouTube videos with scientific journals. The article still suffers from disproportionate focus on the United States that needs to be addressed
840:
All the information seems to come from the perspective of the LGBTQ community. There are no answers to questions like: Do businesses consider pink capitalism to be a real thing? Do businesses have a term for when they market for a specifically gay community? Do politicians mention pink capitalism? Do
805:
While this makes for a great synthesis essay, on
Knowledge facts are things like "Spain is a country in Europe". Anything else needs to be phrased, "according to John Doe, pink capitalism has resulted in the gentrification of" -- followed by a reference. While there are plenty of references here, it
798:
Phrases like "Underground phase" need to be explained in the text below; phrases like "From sexual liberation to the gay male ideal" need to be rewritten to sound less like ways to grab a reader's attention and more like a statement of fact. Also, titles in both
English and Spanish ("Alternative
695:
With all that, and contrary to the ideas of equality, traditionally the political left has treated the LGBT movement (as it happened with feminism) as extravagance or cultural singularities which fragmented its political agenda, without attending the specific needs of non-heterosexual people and
871:
Only ending up sounding highfalutin and self-aggrandized. It needs to be made more concise in its points, and less "flowery" in its diction. I would rewrite the article - as I have worked as an editor for many years - but honestly I can't understand the meaning of some of the author's /authors'
515:
Someone please specify in the first paragraph that this article is primarily describing a
Western phenomenon - and that while rainbow capitalism may be a useful concept for understanding cultural/economic shifts in other societies, the authors of this article focused the article on the West.
705:. Like, it is a reasonable thing to say that many on the political left that have a Marxist class-based analysis of oppression struggled to cope with activism based around other identity factors (race, gender and sexuality, say). But if Knowledge is going to claim that, it needs to
597:
820:
and results of pink capitalism, but nothing (outside the lead) that talks about the objective history (of how the term developed and of how the thing that is "pink capitalism" came about). Are there examples of pink capitalism before the 20th century? Leads should
836:
The information in this article refers almost exclusively to Spain and the United States. Again, outside of the lead, there is no general discussion of pink capitalism. There is also nothing on pink capitalism in South
America, Asia, other countries in Europe,
980:
153:
548:
1056:
523:
872:
expressions; and I have revised and simplified Wiki articles before and it has offended (the literary integrity of some) contributors and only ended up in an editing war... I don't even bother.
947:
If anyone fancies a bit of drive-by copyediting; this article needs to have its citations spread out far more thinly, as some sentences are way too over-cited as of present. --
806:
is important to note that on
Knowledge, footnotes and references are distinct things. You can't state someone's opinion and then just reference the work it came from. You must
147:
1061:
788:
I took care of some of this, but there are still some needlessly long words in there. Articles on
Knowledge are meant to be understood by as many readers as possible,
853:
for an example of style and content, and then try to tackle all of the issues with this article. There's a good foundation here, it just needs some more work. --
709:: show a few representative examples and point to a source that backs up that assertion rather than simply assert it with neither a citation nor an example. —
849:
I know I'm asking a lot, but this is what it takes to make a good
Knowledge article. I'd suggest an editor with the time and interest to research to read
1046:
1036:
399:
389:
79:
44:
925:
Somewhere under the rubble of overwhelming verbiage there is truth there. It is simple truth, and just needs to be stated in a simple, rational manner.
613:
560:
911:
Somewhere under the rubble of overwhelming verbiage there is truth there. It is simple truth, and just needs to be stated in simple, mature manner.
1051:
278:
826:
799:
Pride, Indignant Pride and
Critical Pride (Orgullo Alternativo, Orgullo Indignado y Orgullo Crítico)") do not belong on the English Knowledge.
85:
689:
365:
992:
1041:
527:
896:
552:
274:
264:
227:
926:
912:
873:
168:
775:
649:
445:
356:
317:
135:
99:
30:
1031:
547:
This article is or was the subject of a Wiki
Education Foundation-supported course assignment. Further details are available
104:
20:
952:
661:
348:
74:
202:
653:
633:
65:
129:
441:
422:
701:
There's plenty of sentences like this where a lot is being said but completely failing to follow the principle of
1013:
948:
683:
669:
125:
868:
Yes, this page is too verbose and opaque. Intelligibility is sacrificed by an author trying to sound academic
1003:
I've completed a partial rewrite of this article to comply with
Knowledge standards. It had been tagged for
900:
109:
930:
916:
877:
175:
489:
208:
1009:
892:
714:
519:
190:
858:
803:
The article is based entirely on "expert" opinions, but written as though these opinions are facts.
679:
665:
643:
161:
55:
482:
364:
on Knowledge. If you would like to participate, please visit the project page, where you can join
1004:
971:
This article was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment, between
733:
621:
588:
This article was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment, between
568:
70:
24:
141:
702:
434:
416:
988:
842:
51:
710:
657:
273:-related issues on Knowledge. For more information, or to get involved, please visit the
984:
854:
639:
605:
601:
1025:
617:
564:
850:
255:
332:
311:
967:
584:
543:
239:
221:
338:
245:
1017:
956:
934:
920:
904:
881:
862:
718:
673:
625:
572:
531:
501:
361:
342:
743:
much work to be done. To anyone with a vested interest in this page:
810:
state THAT it's an opinion and then WHOSE it is before you continue.
729:
I arrived at this page randomly from the list of pages tagged with
270:
269:, which tries to ensure comprehensive and factual coverage of all
814:
There needs to be more on the history of the term and definition.
825:
contain information not mentioned elsewhere in the article. See
774:
This article is written like someone's personal essay. This is
477:
184:
15:
660:
tagged it as possibly containing original research), and the
493:
841:
economists mention pink capitalism? etc., etc. I think some
792:
to impress a teacher with one's ability to use a thesaurus.
778:. I've listed each of the specific problems in turn below.
1057:
Articles created or improved during Wiki Loves Pride 2019
696:
reducing their problems to the rest of the working class.
488:
This article was edited to contain a total or partial
160:
579:
Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
538:
Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
360:, a collaborative effort to improve the coverage of
796:The section titles are not clear and descriptive.
764:Formatting and effort that went into its creation
33:for general discussion of the article's subject.
752:Lead - well-written, descriptive, clear, short
497:
174:
8:
440:This article was created or improved during
962:Wiki Education assignment: What is Politics
652:), from what I see, this entire article is
890:
739:. I took care of that, but there is still
517:
411:
306:
216:
889:Almost nothing on this article is true.
786:The language is too flowery and elevated.
614:Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment
561:Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment
511:Clarify the Western Focus of the Article
1062:Pages translated from Spanish Knowledge
612:Above undated message substituted from
559:Above undated message substituted from
524:2603:7081:4600:B583:29D3:93A9:9B4A:6B00
413:
308:
218:
188:
827:Knowledge:Manual of Style/Lead section
725:Copyedit done; still much work needed
656:(which is why it is good that tagged
7:
354:This article is within the scope of
207:It is of interest to the following
23:for discussing improvements to the
976:
972:
593:
589:
287:Knowledge:WikiProject LGBT studies
14:
1047:Low-importance Economics articles
1037:WikiProject LGBT studies articles
290:Template:WikiProject LGBT studies
979:. Further details are available
966:
596:. Further details are available
583:
542:
481:
433:
415:
341:
331:
310:
248:
238:
220:
189:
45:Click here to start a new topic.
394:This article has been rated as
374:Knowledge:WikiProject Economics
261:This article is of interest to
1052:WikiProject Economics articles
843:secondary and tertiary sources
816:There's plenty of info on the
457:Template:Wiki Loves Pride talk
377:Template:WikiProject Economics
1:
957:12:20, 29 November 2020 (UTC)
553:RonBurgundyStayClassySanDiego
504:to see a list of its authors.
368:and see a list of open tasks.
349:Business and economics portal
42:Put new text under old text.
863:16:24, 27 October 2016 (UTC)
719:07:56, 28 January 2016 (UTC)
674:22:22, 25 January 2016 (UTC)
626:02:58, 18 January 2022 (UTC)
573:02:58, 18 January 2022 (UTC)
502:history of the original page
532:03:02, 24 August 2022 (UTC)
50:New to Knowledge? Welcome!
1078:
1042:C-Class Economics articles
454:Knowledge:Wiki Loves Pride
400:project's importance scale
1018:04:39, 23 July 2022 (UTC)
943:Citations on this article
935:09:41, 27 July 2022 (UTC)
921:09:40, 27 July 2022 (UTC)
905:14:13, 30 June 2019 (UTC)
882:09:37, 27 July 2022 (UTC)
460:Wiki Loves Pride articles
428:
393:
326:
233:
215:
80:Be welcoming to newcomers
265:WikiProject LGBT studies
769:What needs to be fixed:
845:could be helpful here.
662:WP:Non-English sources
197:This article is rated
75:avoid personal attacks
1032:C-Class LGBT articles
983:. Student editor(s):
600:. Student editor(s):
551:. Student editor(s):
357:WikiProject Economics
277:or contribute to the
100:Neutral point of view
761:Links to other pages
758:Number of references
654:WP:Original research
634:WP:Original research
105:No original research
949:Ineffablebookkeeper
981:on the course page
632:Entire article is
604:. Peer reviewers:
598:on the course page
549:on the course page
380:Economics articles
203:content assessment
86:dispute resolution
47:
25:Rainbow capitalism
907:
895:comment added by
534:
522:comment added by
508:
507:
498:Spanish Knowledge
476:
475:
472:
471:
468:
467:
410:
409:
406:
405:
305:
304:
301:
300:
183:
182:
66:Assume good faith
43:
1069:
993:article contribs
978:
974:
970:
776:not encyclopedic
738:
732:
703:Show, don't tell
628:
595:
594:10 December 2021
591:
587:
575:
546:
494:Capitalismo rosa
485:
478:
462:
461:
458:
455:
452:
451:Wiki Loves Pride
442:Wiki Loves Pride
437:
430:
429:
423:Wiki Loves Pride
419:
412:
382:
381:
378:
375:
372:
351:
346:
345:
335:
328:
327:
322:
314:
307:
295:
294:
291:
288:
285:
258:
253:
252:
251:
242:
235:
234:
224:
217:
200:
194:
193:
185:
179:
178:
164:
95:Article policies
16:
1077:
1076:
1072:
1071:
1070:
1068:
1067:
1066:
1022:
1021:
1010:Thebiguglyalien
1008:in the future.
1001:
973:14 January 2022
964:
945:
736:
730:
727:
637:
611:
581:
558:
540:
513:
459:
456:
453:
450:
449:
379:
376:
373:
370:
369:
347:
340:
320:
292:
289:
286:
283:
282:
254:
249:
247:
201:on Knowledge's
198:
121:
116:
115:
114:
91:
61:
12:
11:
5:
1075:
1073:
1065:
1064:
1059:
1054:
1049:
1044:
1039:
1034:
1024:
1023:
1000:
997:
963:
960:
944:
941:
940:
939:
938:
937:
887:
886:
885:
884:
847:
846:
838:
833:
832:
831:
830:
811:
800:
793:
780:
779:
766:
765:
762:
759:
756:
753:
726:
723:
722:
721:
699:
698:
697:
680:Flyer22 Reborn
666:Flyer22 Reborn
664:are an issue.
636:
630:
590:23 August 2021
580:
577:
539:
536:
512:
509:
506:
505:
500:. Consult the
486:
474:
473:
470:
469:
466:
465:
463:
438:
426:
425:
420:
408:
407:
404:
403:
396:Low-importance
392:
386:
385:
383:
366:the discussion
353:
352:
336:
324:
323:
321:Low‑importance
315:
303:
302:
299:
298:
296:
260:
259:
243:
231:
230:
225:
213:
212:
206:
195:
181:
180:
118:
117:
113:
112:
107:
102:
93:
92:
90:
89:
82:
77:
68:
62:
60:
59:
48:
39:
38:
35:
34:
28:
13:
10:
9:
6:
4:
3:
2:
1074:
1063:
1060:
1058:
1055:
1053:
1050:
1048:
1045:
1043:
1040:
1038:
1035:
1033:
1030:
1029:
1027:
1020:
1019:
1015:
1011:
1006:
998:
996:
994:
990:
986:
982:
969:
961:
959:
958:
954:
950:
942:
936:
932:
928:
924:
923:
922:
918:
914:
910:
909:
908:
906:
902:
898:
894:
883:
879:
875:
870:
869:
867:
866:
865:
864:
860:
856:
852:
844:
839:
835:
834:
828:
824:
819:
815:
812:
809:
804:
801:
797:
794:
791:
787:
784:
783:
782:
781:
777:
773:
772:
771:
770:
763:
760:
757:
754:
751:
750:
749:
748:
747:What is good:
744:
742:
735:
724:
720:
716:
712:
708:
707:show not tell
704:
700:
694:
693:
691:
688:
685:
681:
678:
677:
676:
675:
671:
667:
663:
659:
655:
651:
648:
645:
641:
635:
631:
629:
627:
623:
619:
615:
609:
607:
603:
599:
586:
578:
576:
574:
570:
566:
562:
556:
554:
550:
545:
537:
535:
533:
529:
525:
521:
510:
503:
499:
495:
491:
487:
484:
480:
479:
464:
447:
443:
439:
436:
432:
431:
427:
424:
421:
418:
414:
401:
397:
391:
388:
387:
384:
367:
363:
359:
358:
350:
344:
339:
337:
334:
330:
329:
325:
319:
316:
313:
309:
297:
293:LGBT articles
280:
276:
272:
268:
267:
266:
257:
246:
244:
241:
237:
236:
232:
229:
226:
223:
219:
214:
210:
204:
196:
192:
187:
186:
177:
173:
170:
167:
163:
159:
155:
152:
149:
146:
143:
140:
137:
134:
131:
127:
124:
123:Find sources:
120:
119:
111:
110:Verifiability
108:
106:
103:
101:
98:
97:
96:
87:
83:
81:
78:
76:
72:
69:
67:
64:
63:
57:
53:
52:Learn to edit
49:
46:
41:
40:
37:
36:
32:
26:
22:
18:
17:
1002:
989:HonorsHannah
977:3 March 2022
965:
946:
897:23.91.229.74
891:— Preceding
888:
851:LGBT history
848:
822:
818:implications
817:
813:
807:
802:
795:
789:
785:
768:
767:
746:
745:
740:
728:
706:
686:
646:
638:
610:
582:
557:
541:
518:— Preceding
514:
395:
355:
284:LGBT studies
275:project page
263:
262:
256:LGBTQ portal
228:LGBT studies
209:WikiProjects
171:
165:
157:
150:
144:
138:
132:
122:
94:
19:This is the
1005:WP:NOTESSAY
927:123.2.12.74
913:123.2.12.74
874:123.2.12.74
490:translation
148:free images
31:not a forum
1026:Categories
711:Tom Morris
658:Tom Morris
279:discussion
985:Socal2025
855:2ReinreB2
734:Copy edit
640:DaddyCell
606:Kaitcrain
602:Cjoson100
496:from the
371:Economics
362:Economics
318:Economics
88:if needed
71:Be polite
21:talk page
893:unsigned
755:Pictures
690:contribs
650:contribs
618:PrimeBOT
565:PrimeBOT
520:unsigned
56:get help
29:This is
27:article.
999:Rewrite
398:on the
199:C-class
154:WP refs
142:scholar
205:scale.
126:Google
823:never
808:first
271:LGBTQ
169:JSTOR
130:books
84:Seek
1014:talk
975:and
953:talk
931:talk
917:talk
901:talk
878:talk
859:talk
837:etc.
715:talk
684:talk
670:talk
644:talk
622:talk
592:and
569:talk
528:talk
446:2019
162:FENS
136:news
73:and
995:).
790:not
616:by
563:by
492:of
390:Low
176:TWL
1028::
1016:)
987:,
955:)
933:)
919:)
903:)
880:)
861:)
741:so
737:}}
731:{{
717:)
672:)
624:)
608:.
571:)
555:.
530:)
444:,
156:)
54:;
1012:(
991:(
951:(
929:(
915:(
899:(
876:(
857:(
829:.
713:(
687:·
682:(
668:(
647:·
642:(
620:(
567:(
526:(
448:.
402:.
281:.
211::
172:·
166:·
158:·
151:·
145:·
139:·
133:·
128:(
58:.
Text is available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License. Additional terms may apply.
