132:"However, it made its indelible mark when at Gen Con in August 1993, the company debuted Richard Garfield's Collectible card game Magic: The Gathering under the shell company Garfield Games to shelter it from the legal battle with Palladium." Example of long sentence that repeats data from the prior paragraph. "In 1997, Wizards of the Coast was granted U.S. Patent 5,662,332 on collectible card games, followed by the purchase of TSR, Inc., the cash-strapped makers of Dungeons & Dragons." How do these two events relate, except chronologically? Large lists of works should be pruned and represented as prose, or separated out into
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That sounds like a reasonable chronology breakdown. You definitely have a lot more information in the article now, now the challenge is to write a good narrative with it. And yeah, I saw that you've flagged the web community stuff as needing work, so I figured it was a bit redundant to tell you it
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I do have some unsourced material I need to either reference or remove. The "web community" section, for example. ;) Also the info on the aftermath of the TSR purchase. I think it would be good to expand the
Pokemon coverage to be more like the MTG and D&D coverage, so I need to find a source
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No big deal--as long as improvements are being made, I'm not going to fail the article from hold. It's already come a long way, and I don't mind an iterative process. Just drop a note here when you think you've made significant enough additions that it's worthwhile for me to re-review.
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I fixed #6 (although one image is refusing to show), and I think I've improved #1-3 substantially, although I may have a way to go still to get it to GA. I've had a few suggestions from other people to follow up on, but I'll probably just pause for rest for today. :)
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It seems to me that there could be a lot more said about
Wizards' history. Integrating the games may help, but I really don't get a good feel for the company's history and evolution. It shared a lot of "dotcom" characteristics, yet I don't see those reflected
661:
Acquisitions... not sure, other than buying TSR and gaining the
Pokemon license. :) Would a change of the header title be sufficient here, because I'm not sure if they bought any other companies at that time, and really pulled that heading out of thin
355:
This is pretty weak, and I don't think all the elements necessary to have a GA are in this article yet, even with major work. Do we really want to leave this on hold for multiple weeks, given the 0.7 deadline has now passed?
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It's a good question. :) I think I'll work on the article for now, regardless, and see how far I can take it. If I reach a point where I've had enough or we don't know where else to go, then so be it. I'm fine with that. :)
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You have a reference in the external links list. There are probably more reliable sources out there--you've got a couple, but I am almost certain that there are substantive additional sources which need to be researched and
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Hi! BOZ just pointed this article out to me... I'm hoping to make some more improvements sometime on the 10th, so if you held off on your re-review another day or so I might be able to make the article a bit better. Thanks!
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If that's all you can find RS'es for, that's all you can find RS'es for. But it still seems worthwhile to check. Acquisitions and the reasoning behind them tend to be important in the life of corporations.
642:
Sold to Hasbro.... why? Surely some RS must have commented on the economics, synergies, greed, or business blunders which led to this, wouldn't you think? It's the most glaring omission left in the article.
665:
Regarding the sale of Hasbro, I have no idea why they sold it, although I think I read that WotC's success with
Pokemon made the company attractive to Hasbro. I'll have to recheck my sources on that one.
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Thanks for the input. I was unclear of the signficance of these other games, so rather than list everything I just went with what I knew or what was specifically mentioned in the RS's I was reading. :)
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As far as sectioning the history, I'm thinking "Pre-TSR purchase" and "Hasbro era", with the purchase of TSR and addition of the
Pokemon game would fill a middle section in between.
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gives short shrift to some of the early innovations. (Robo Rally, BTW, is the single geekiest game known to man. It not only attracts computer programmers, but you almost have to
451:
The history section has gotten a lot more comprehensive. It's an unmistakable improvement, but now the challenge is going to be to break that down into logical sections.
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If anything, you may have gotten rid of too many of the non-D&D, non-M:tG product references. While the bare list was horrid, the lack of references to things like
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I'm sure I can find it - I probably overlooked it without realizing the significance. :) I just did some more cleanup, and I'll start looking again now.
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Passed per improvements. The lead section is now barely long enough for the article length, though. Wouldn't hurt to expand it. Good job!
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Time for another break - I think I have everything sourced now, and have pretty much any notable events for the company included. :)
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Ready for another re-review when you are. Also, it's not ready yet, but I'd like to make use of a template like
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for that as well. There is a list of awards won that I need to pluck a few choice entries out of.
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Tonight is game night, so most of this will have to wait for tomorrow, or over the weekend. :)
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Will do. Just got caught up in a rangeblock, though, so I'm going to wait until that clears.
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448:"Image:Players hndbk v35 cover.jpg" needs a separate fair use rationale for this article.
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improvement in the article, well worth keeping it on hold while you continue your work.
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More pictures would be nice. Just one logo is a pretty minimalist image set.
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I've just added ref for why Hasbro purchased WotC. -
410:Ok, let me know when you're ready for a re-review.
751:Wow, awesome! Better than expected. Thanks! :)
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303:(images are tagged and non-free images have
709:That should be at least a bit better, now.
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424:Any time is a good time! :)
420:19:43, 4 November 2008 (UTC)
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646:Still looking pretty good.
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18:Talk:Wizards of the Coast
520:still needed work. :-)
101:reasonably well written
317:(appropriate use with
292:It is illustrated by
244:neutral point of view
206:broad in its coverage
305:fair use rationales
560:when it is ready.
145:factually accurate
456:The Great Dalmuti
319:suitable captions
276:No edit wars etc.
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57:Article talk
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635:Acquisition
472:substantial
470:Overall, a
44:visual edit
150:verifiable
460:RoboRally
345:Pass/Fail
223:(focused)
197:included.
27:GA Review
739:Drilnoth
725:Jclemens
683:Jclemens
648:Jclemens
606:Jclemens
591:Drilnoth
576:Jclemens
522:Jclemens
476:Jclemens
412:Jclemens
358:Jclemens
662:air. ;)
339:Overall
108:(prose)
67:history
48:history
34:Article
295:images
270:stable
268:It is
246:policy
204:It is
143:It is
99:It is
88:review
234:here.
90:(see
76:Watch
16:<
757:talk
743:talk
729:talk
715:talk
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687:talk
672:talk
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610:talk
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580:talk
566:talk
558:this
548:talk
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480:talk
458:and
430:talk
416:talk
402:talk
383:talk
362:talk
147:and
92:here
63:edit
40:edit
753:BOZ
711:BOZ
697:BOZ
668:BOZ
562:BOZ
544:BOZ
507:BOZ
426:BOZ
398:BOZ
379:BOZ
120:MoS
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347::
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188::
184:OR
180:c
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156:a
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116:b
110::
106:a
103:.
86:GA
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